Solo Travel Ups and Downs
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After 26 days traveling with my father in Nepal, we parted at the Delhi airport. I found myself choking back tears as I gave him a hug and we parted. I was traveling solo again. Why was I, a person who typically does solo travel, crying about being solo again? I wish I knew. I kind of chalk it up to being an overly emotional person. However I think it’s always hard when you get used to spending time with someone for a month and then they leave again and you are back on your own; no one to lean on but yourself. There’s a period of sadness that goes along with that.
Don’t get me wrong – I love solo travel for many, many reasons. However, it’s something that you have to adjust into and find your rhythm. Every time I strike out on my own I have to get used to it again.
I was headed to Sri Lanka, another new country to mark off my list! However, I wasn’t merely going to give it a check mark; I was heading to Sri Lanka to hit the beach…in luxury. I have friends from Vietnam who own a large beach villa in Sri Lanka called Auraliya, and when they heard I was traveling to Sri Lanka they kindly offered the villa for me to stay at in exchange for some photography they needed for future marketing.
I arrived in Sri Lanka around midnight and still had a 3 hour drive ahead of me to the villa just south of Galle. I made it through customs and I stared around confused at the appliances for sale in the airport…something I had never seen before. Magazines yes, dish washers no. I looked past the refrigerators, stoves, and washers, and saw a man holding a sign with my name on it…bingo…that was my driver. I got in the comfy car, he gave me a pillow and I slept for the next 3 hours until we pulled up at Auraliya.
I felt as if I were Dorthy, who had fallen asleep and been transported to Oz…a very luxurious Oz. A man in a sarong welcomed me, and kindly led me through an entrance down a long walkway and into a room. I could hear the waves crashing and smell the sea air. My day of travel had sucked the energy out of me and I went straight to bed.
All of this for Solo Me?
The next morning I looked around the room in amazement, luxury was an understatement. I proceeded open up the blinds to have the beach and crashing waves meet me as if they were personally saying “Good Morning Sherry”. I wandered out of the room into the open air pathways when a big, floppy black lab came to greet me. She bounded down the pathway and gave me a good licking; this villa came complete with a loving, loyal dog…talk about perks!
I went to one of the large dining pavilions and was greeted by the same man who greeted me the previous night, Sunny. What a perfect name for a perfect place. He motioned for me to sit down at the long 12 person dining table in which there was one little place setting…just for me. I felt a bit dwarfed as plates of fresh fruit, eggs, breads, and bacon were placed in front of me. I felt like Imelda Marcos having shoes paraded in front of me…it was surreal.
As I sat and ate my beautifully carved fresh fruit, drank my strong coffee, and stared out across the long expanse of table towards the crashing waves, I thought, “It sure sucks to not have someone to share this with.” I imagined how amazing the place would be with my friends or family surrounding me at the table with witty banter and mimosas flowing. But there was just me; and 11 empty chairs. However I did have a beautiful black lab at my feet waiting for my next move to follow me wherever I went.
I sat with Sunny and planned the rest of the menu for my 5 days at the villa. There was actually a staff of 5 people running the villa and they made food to order. Once I chose a menu, they’d go shopping and get everything they needed for the week…including beer.
Let’s go through the math – 12 chairs, 6 bedrooms, 5 bathrooms, 5 staff of people waiting on me, 3 pavilions, and 1 dog; I felt dwarfed. Needless to say, I never wanted for a thing. I finished a drink and someone was at my side asking if I wanted another. I got up to go to the sitting pavilion and the dog dutifully followed me. I set down an empty glass and it was whisked away before it hit the table.
That first day I laid around in ‘luxury shock’ – this isn’t the normal way I travel; it took a bit of getting used to. However I also managed to get out my camera and start my process of photographing the grounds; as the dog, Kala, followed my every move. I felt a bit tired and sluggish and wasn’t sure if it was due to all of the attention lavished upon me, or if it was because just a 3 days ago I was hiking in the Himalayas and now I was walking around at sea level…maybe my body was in shock.
Sick and Solo
However as the day went on, a headache came on, I was exhausted, and felt achy. This was the beginning of something serious. Why oh why did this have to happen now…when I was in my villa of luxury? However, in some respects it happened at the best time. Being sick and alone with a staff of people waiting on you and a sympathetic dog is better than being sick and alone in a hostel bunk bed.
For the next 5 days, I walked around in a daze with a fever, sinus headache, and generally feeling of death. Did I say I love traveling solo earlier? Well, I meant to say love traveling solo unless I’m sick. Then the love morphs into a pathetic mound of self-pity. For some reason – the only time I really ever get homesick when I travel is when I get sick. As a solo traveler, when you are sick, there’s no one to lean on, and it triggers a longing for me that I have a hard time dealing with.
The staff tried their best to make me feel comfortable; I had ample places to choose from to lie around and take naps. I finally felt lucid enough the 3rd afternoon to take a tuk tuk into town to go to the pharmacy. The pharmacist listened to my ailments and told me to go see a doctor in fear of me having H1N1. I bought some cough drops, Panadol, and tiger balm instead and went back to the villa defeated. The staff continued to try their best to make me feel better. I started trying all of the local remedies – they would put me under a sheet with boiling water to try to steam the illness out of me. They would bring me ‘special’ mixes of herbal tea which did seem to help a bit. I think the staff were amused I would try all of these ‘local’ remedies – but when you feel like death – you’ll try anything.
I was alone; alone in paradise. I couldn’t really even enjoy the amazing surroundings I was in properly which sent me into more of a funk. I promised myself I wouldn’t worry about it and instead one day I would have a ‘do-over’ and come back to Auraliya villa to take walks along the beach and hopefully next time be surrounded by friends and family!
By the end of the week, I had left the villa once…and walked on the beach twice.
I’m absolutely fine traveling alone until sickness strikes, then I just want my mom…funny how we never get too old to want our moms to take care of us. In lieu of my mom, a generous staff of locals and a dog will do.
All of your solo travelers out there…what do you do when you get sick on the road?
If you are interested in learning more about renting Auraliya villa for and unforgettable beach stay with family or friends – check out the website at www.auraliya.com
So sorry you were sick, but the place does look like paradise! I’m really drawn to Sri Lanka, and was so happy to see the safety advisory recently lifted. How safe did you feel outside the hotel grounds?
I didn’t get to go outside the grounds much – but I felt completely at ease. My friends live there as a vacation home and they have never said that they didn’t feel safe. I would recommend anyone to go there in a heartbeat. I felt much more on edge in Rio and Ulanbatar…always watching my back.
This looks like an absolutely magical place. Being sick while you were there… not so magical. Poor you.
As for being sick on the road, I fortunately *knocking furiously on wood* haven’t had anything more than colds and headaches.
It took we quite a while to get used to being sick in Belgium when we first moved here. Not having 24 hour super-sized drug stores was a pain. It’s funny how when you’re sick you turn to the remedies you’ve always used (even when you suspect they don’t really do much). The big thing I missed – Neocitran. I stock-pile it now when I go home to visit.
Not great being sick and not being able to enjoy sucha lovely place, but even if you were well, this looks to my like the kind of place that is crying out to be enjoyed with friends and family
Being sick on the road is no fun – I’ve just gotten over a cold and sinus congestion (which I had to fly with – yuck!) and I felt pretty sorry for myself for a couple of days. I think the best thing to do is to acknowledge that it’s ok to take it easy, and not to feel guilty for skipping sites, or taking it easy – after all, you’re sick and won’t get better any faster if you run yourself into the ground.
Sri Lanka is so gorgeous; my favorite place is right on the river and it’s super inexpensive. It’s geared toward independent, nature-loving travelers and (bonus) it’s shaped like a giant elephant! It’s next to a quaint little village and really allows visitors to get a feel for the local lifestyle. If you want to go back to Sri Lanka again I’d definitely recommend it.
http://www.globalbasecamps.com/sri-lanka/okkampitiya-eco-lodge/kumbukriver
Happy Traveling!
Being sick in a place that looks like paradise- sounds rough! Glad you had a friendly looking dog to comfort you. When I get the solo travel blues, I usually write home to friends and family. It generally does the trick 🙂
What an awesome looking place. Wow.
I too was lucky that the few times I got sick…I somehow was in a place and had time to allow me to just lie in bed.
First I was sick around Chile and Buenos Aires. Both places I actually had friends who met me there from the US. I remember spending my whole first day in Buenos Aires in bed in our hotel. And the second whole day trying to get meds and deal with my travel insurance. I ended up just following a complete stranger I met at the ‘phone’ place to the pharmacy who described to him in Spanish my symptoms. As usual, all I needed was a local…screw the insurance company! It did mean we cut out our trip to Iguazu Falls so we could spend more time in BA, but I was happy about it.
I was sick again with fever in New Zealand. But fortunately, I was staying with friend’s of friends so they let me just crash in their guest room and brought me to their doctor. it also meant less time to see NZ, but when you’re one a 2-3 year trip…you just can’t stress over a few lost days. I was happy to have a bed and soup!!
Sherry,
Sorry you were sick, there’s never a good time or place. But as you say, maybe being in luxury and at least with some peope who could take care of you, if not your family, is better than being truly alone.
It’s only happened to me once solo and it does suck, I don’t know if there’s a magic answer for what you do other than just try to get through it as fast as possible and sleep a lot!
Although it’s only happened a couple of times, I tend to lock myself up in my hotel room at the first sign of sickness during travels. And even though I generally avoid taking medicines when I’m at home, when I’m traveling alone and I get sick, I’m suddenly willing to take anything that will help me feel better as soon as humanly possible.
It’s never a good time of course, but a comfortable hotel room and even semi-attentive and caring staff go long way in helping us get better!
I quite enjoy travelling alone, but dinner time and eating alone can be a bit thankless at times. Good food and good conversation is a good formula for enjoying evenings.
One of your sentences really struck a chord with me. You said “Every time I strike out on my own I have to get used to it again.” I have the exact same experience. No matter how much I’ve traveled, each time I set out on a long-term trip, it takes me a week or two to get back into the rhythm, to feel comfortable in my travel skin. And here I thought I was the only one. Good to know it happens to others too.
Oh goodness – you are not alone! When I arrived in Nepal last year I thought I had digressed back to rookie traveler – it really took me a while to get my travel legs again. I’m sure it will take you time to convert back to being in the US soon!
I am the same way, when I get sick while traveling is about the only time I start to miss my friends and especially my family. I think it is finally a time when I start to think and am not fully busy all the time.
So sorry you didn’t get to enjoy this wonderful place to its potential. I hope you are making a speedy recovery.
Getting sick on the road is the pits no matter how you slice it though alone and sick just amplifies the situation. I think you’re much better off being sick in a nice place though than a hostel- and if you’re sick it’s worth springing for the private bathroom. You don’t need to add the misery of running down a hall to a bathroom – and that’s if you can run at all.
What a beautiful looking spot.
I’m the biggest wuss when I’m sick, and it’s really rough and terrible being alone and sick in a hotel room on the road. Like above, one of the few times I wish to be home and have someone take care of me.
In your case, at least there could be worse places to be sick, where you don’t have a staff of 5 at your side to help out! I’m sure you wouldn’t mind a follow-up trip to spend a bit more quality time there, this time sans illness!
I’ve been ill while on the road solo, and it is the perfect storm for a pity party. Sometimes, we need those moments though and we’re stronger inside when it passes. I’m with you on wanting my mom around when I’m sick.
first of all I am trying to avoid getting sick; just to be careful what I am eating ( of course street food is I am heading first for lunch), try to keep mosquitos out of my skin and so forth. Traveling for only one month so no sick for me yet; how it will be when it will happen? probably heading to a nice spot to recover!