I get many emails from travelers all over the world asking me questions about my travels.  Here are some of the recent ones that are great to share with everyone!  If you have a question, don’t hesitate to ask!

Q:  from Dave – Brooklyn

I came across your blog and was very impressed by your decision to leave your corporate life and travel. My wife and I are planning a similar trip next year and would like to spend some time in SE Asia. I have a question regarding how you managed your cash while in Vietnam.  Did you use ATMs primarily or is there some other method. I bank with HSBC which is pretty global but I would like to avoid ATM fees. Also, did you use a special kind of mobile phone. I’m wondering if I should get an AT&T travel plan and then use my phone abroad.

A:

You ask a great question – and I have some good news – there are HSBC ATMS’s all over Saigon (and Hanoi).  I ALWAYS manage my cash via ATM when traveling – it really is the easiest way and you get the best conversion rate – plus you don’t have to carry so much cash with you at once.  Nearly everywhere I’ve went in the world I’ve been able to find ATMS that work (Peru and parts of S. America and Africa were a bit difficult to find an ATM that took Mastercard backed debit cards).  ATMS’s in other countries rarely charge transaction fees – or you can talk to your bank and see if they can waive it somehow while you are international.  Don’t use Travelers checks – they are certainly a thing of the past.  I normally simply travel with ATM card and carry a bit of emergency US dollars (in new bills as some countries won’t accept old bills) just in case I can’t find another alternative.

Regarding your question about cell phone – my best advice is to use your existing phone – but unlock it from your US carrier so that you can add other SIM cards.  When I arrive in a country – I just buy a SIM card from that country (if I plan to be there for a while) and use that – it’s so much cheaper.  The US carriers will still charge you way too much; even on their ‘international plans’.  I can’t stress enought the benefit of an unlocked phone.  The US is the only place in the world that locks their phone to specific carriers and it’s really frustrating.  If you need to unlock your phone – just do some searches on craigs list and you’ll find people that will do it.  I went to China Town in NYC and had mine unlocked – there’s a hacker somewhere who will do it!  Or just buy a cheap simple phone in a different country and use that as your ‘travel phone’.  If it’s cheap enough…no one will want to steal it!

Q:  from Susan – Ireland

Wondered if you can recommend specific TEFL programmes? I have a ton of work experience, including teaching and training, as well as a good educational background, but I assume for most positions now days, you must be TEFL certified? and i hear that CELTA is the best?

A:

I can’t say that I’m any expert on ESL certification.  I can only tell you that I did some research and decided to get my CELTA certification as I had also heard it was the best.  Yet in retrospect – I don’t think it CELTA vs. TEFL matters at all – especially with your other credentials.  I took my certification while in NYC – but it’s much more expensive to do in the US.  The school where I taught in Vietnam actually offered CELTA certification there for half the price and then you could apply for jobs with them.  So – it’s good to potentially research potential certification options (TEFL or CELTA) in the city where you want to travel to.  Also with credentials like yours – you may not need any further certification  - you may be able to apply for university ESL jobs in various cities…which would pay better!  CELTA certification doesn’t teach you anything about grammar…it teaches you how to teach and manage a classroom – these are skill you likely already have!  A good place to look for what jobs are out there and what the requirements are is TEFL.com – I get their daily newsletter about openings around the world.

Wandering yes...educator...hmmm?

I was recently contacted by a website to do an interview.  To my surprise, the website was www.wanderingeducators.com .  Am I really an educator…am I wandering…hmmm – I never really thought about it like that.  I just thought I was running away from ‘real life’ and trying to make enough money to live!

As you all know though, I love any chance to do an interview, it gives my lonely little blogging life meaning and purpose.  It reminds me that people do actually read the stuff that I write…and they like it!  Jessie from Wandering Educators contacted me for an interview and of course after looking at the site and making sure that it wasn’t porn, I said yes! 

View the Ottsworld interview on Wandering Educators

Jessie asked some great questions that really made me think about my experiences here and changing from corporate life to a life of teaching and living abroad.  What I love about interviews is that is forces me to see my life from an outsiders perspective – and it generally looks pretty good from the outside looking in; inside looking out is not always so pretty!  However this interview did remind me of just how lucky I am to be living this adventure!

Please check out the interview and wander around their site!  They feature some great artists, and travel book reviews.

End of class celebration

I’ve been teaching ESL now for 5 months and it’s had it’s up and downs. It’s honestly a lot of work, but it does get a bit easier once you’ve been there for a while. The prep time is reduced, and you learn that you simply need to stay a step ahead of the students. However I’m still rapidly trying to learn grammar rules that I question whether I ever learned in the first place or did I simply just learn by exposure?

I think I have successfully adopted the teacher image; I grade with a red pen, I often have ‘white board dust’ all over my clothes, and I lecture the students when they are late. I have stopped short of wearing my hair in a bun; I’m not really into the school marm look. However I have definitely adopted the ‘elder’ attitude. Just the other day we had learned about how to say the time of day. The next class one of my students came 30 minutes late. I let him come in and sit down (interrupting my class) and then I asked him “Tuan, What time is it?” He says “half past five.” I proceed to ask him “What time does class start?” “He sheepishly says five.” I continue teaching feeling proud of myself that I have made my point and then I get this sudden wave of panic – I feel like my father all of a sudden; I’m reprimanding people! These are the reasons why I’m not a parent…my lord – what have I gotten myself into?

My first few months were spent learning how to assert myself. I’m sure those that know me would find this surprising. I started off rather nice, and now I find myself confiscating phones everyday and scolding people for not showing up on time.
I wasn’t expecting this ‘mean teacher’ role that I would have to play because I think that I was lulled into thinking that I was going to be teaching adults. Sure, my students range in age from 18 to 40, but the majority of them are about 18 to 20 and I quickly learned that 18 is the new 14 in Vietnam. The maturity level of students here is about 4 years behind what my expectations are. So this means that I find myself thinking of silly games and competitions to keep their interest, and I’m constantly trying to manage the classroom and get people to listen to me. It’s a good thing I inherited my mother’s voice.

In India they called me Mam, in Nepal they called my Miss, but I have a different ‘title’ in Vietnam. Luckily my students don’t call me Ms. Ott – else I may puke, instead I simply answer the name of Teacher – Teacher. It’s normally always said twice for some reason. Vietnamese students don’t raise their hands, instead they just say Teacher – Teacher, and I go to their desk and help them or at least attempt to help them. I often accidentially making my job even harder. The other day we were learning food vocabulary and I made the mistake of saying that my favorite ice cream flavor was cinnamon. As soon as it came out of my mouth I regretted it. How the hell was I going to explain cinnamon. They don’t use cinnamon here! About 75% of the time I spend miming vocabulary, drawing stick figures, acting out feelings and singing songs; I should be nominated for an Oscar. I don’t really know who has taken over my body and mind when I do these things as it’s certainly not within my normal personality to behave this way; however you go to great measure to teach sometimes.

I love learning about the culture of where I’m living or traveling – and the classroom is no exception. I get a lot of time to observe students and Vietnamese culture in general. One of the things that always amuses me is that as soon as a Vietnamese student sits down, they take off their shoes (normally some kind of flip-flop or easy to remove sandal). I have no idea why, but when the Vietnamese are sitting down, they prefer to be barefoot. I look around my classroom, and most of my students are completely relaxed, shoes off, and watching me mime out the word shower.

Strangely, the fact that my students have a very limited vocabulary is one of my greatest sources of happiness. If I walk in the classroom wearing a dress and nice shoes, the girls all give a shriek that startles me as I walk in and it’s followed by “Teacher, you look beautiful today.”    I love these moments – who doesn’t want to be called beautiful.  Especially in a country where western women are completely invisible to any male attention (sorry – forgive that dig but I just couldn’t help myself). They don’t simply say “Teacher, you look very sophisticated today” or “Teacher, that dress looks very good on you”; these are way to complicated of phrases for my elementary students! No, instead they tell me that I’m “beautiful”. There are not many moments where I get called beautiful in my life, but here I get it about once a week. However, with the good comes the bad. The times where I get the other variation, “You are so beautiful – why you aren’t married?” I know there’s a compliment in there somewhere…but sometimes it’s really hard to find/see.

Teaching has it’s rewarding times and it’s tough times. The reward is when you actually bond with the students and you catch them actually using something that you taught them. I have some students that have been with me for 5 months. They invite me to parties and out for Karaoke (which I kindly refuse).  They know more about me than many of my ex-boyfriends. Most importantly, they know that I love cinnamon ice cream and that I hate green peppers. They know that I’m not married because I like my independence (yet I don’t think they’ve fully grasped the word ‘independence’ yet). They know about my entire family, where they live and what their names and ages are. They know about my dear friends and what they do for a living. They know that I don’t want children. They know I love to travel and write. I am their window into western culture and they are my window into Vietnamese culture; a mutually beneficial relationship!

I recently recieved a little recognition from one of the volunteer companies I worked with in 2007.  Cross Cultural Solutions chose me as their ‘Alumni In Focus’ for their newsletter.  I was rather stunned, but I think they wrote a very nice article that highlights some of the high points of my volunteering with them.  Cross Cultural Solutions is a US based volunteer organization with volunteer opportunities throughout the world.  Volunteering with them in Delhi was the highlights of my around the world travel!   Plus, I am still in touch with many of my old students yet today.  I hear from them all about once a month on email and they are doing wonderful; they moved on to various jobs and studies.  I am so proud of them!   If you are considering taking some time and giving back, check out Cross Cultural Solutions!

Here’s the link to the “Alumni In Focus” article – Enjoy!

Isn't this how all cities are wired? This is completely normal!

I had a funny little day yesterday. The scary part is that I’m starting to believe this is normal for my life in Vietnam. My definition of normal has slowly changed over the last three months. I often wonder what my friends in the US would think…is this normal? I will let you be the judge.

I woke up to the cleaning lady ringing the doorbell to the apartment at 8:30AM. Now I normally don’t sleep that late, but in my defense, I’ve been sick. The cleaning lady proceeds to leave her shoes outside and comes in and cleans the whole apartment for the next 3 hours PLUS doing my ironing for the grand total of $6. This seems like a totally normal price to me – so what if I used to pay $60 for that in NYC and there was no sign of an iron being picked up. As I puttered around getting my breakfast I noticed a stream of ants in my kitchen…damn…I knew they would find me; it’s inevitable in the tropics. However – I was prepared for the ants – every piece of food is in it’s own little piece of plastic armor; a zip lock bag. I take my cereal out of the box and immediately put it in a zip lock, my tea bags are zip locked, my crackers are zip locked, my pasta is zip locked…so why the hell are these ants in my kitchen?! I motion to my cleaning lady and point at the ants. We watch them march up into the cupboards and around the secure zip lock bags (this is easy to see as the cupboards are clear plastic just for this purpose – to see bugs – it’s like human night vision). My cleaning lady knows no English at all. She assesses the ant situation and mimes the action for a spray can and makes the ‘psssttttttt’ noise pointing towards the ant army. Apparently there is an international sound for bug spray. Hmmm – we had a whole conversation without saying a word…normal?

Completely normal - standing in oncoming traffic spraying down the road...I love it!

After lathering up with mosquito lotion I get to work. I spent the morning working trying to make a living writing and doing IT consulting. Around lunch time I walked out to the corner, dodging the motorbikes driving on the street, to meet my motorbike taxi driver, Nam. We sped off to the post office where I had to pick up some package that was mailed to me at school. I went inside, and figured out where to go after about 10 min. of trying to read signs that I didn’t understand. I proceeded to wait 40 minutes after I gave them my claim slip and passport number for someone to pull a CD sized envelope out of the back room and give it to me. Finding my inner patience…the key to survival here.

I got back on the motorbike taxi and went to the school to teach my elementary students. I was doing a review on past simple tense and used the song Yesterday to help them understand the concept. After about 5 times of listening to the song, they were able to put the lyrics in order and we all sang the song for the 5th time. I hate karaoke, and here I am belting out Yesterday in the name of learning…what has happened to me?

Nam picked me up after work and we started to head back to my apartment. While sitting at a busy traffic light inhaling petrol fumes he asked me in broken English if I wanted to learn how to drive a motorbike. “Yes, I do want to learn how to drive myself, but I’m scared!” I said. He said, “Easy, I teach you in hour.” With this last statement he started to pull over to the side and slow down…I quickly realized that he meant ‘learn NOW’…not ‘learn in general’. “Oh, no, no, no – I cannot learn tonight! There is too much traffic and I don’t think I’m ready!” Nam kindly understands my sheer terror of the thought of learning to drive a motorbike during rush hour and speeds back up and heads towards home. I kept wondering if Nam understood that if he taught me how to ride, he was out of a job! However, I loved his ‘just do it’ attitude…so as he dropped me off at the little mini-mart across the street from my apartment, I said, “If there is a place with no traffic, I can go on Saturday morning and try to learn.” He seemed all excited about it, and we made a ‘driving lesson date’. God help me.

Washing dishes in the street...why not?!

At the mini-mart I sat in the isle looking at bug spray for about 15 minutes. I was shopping by pictures as there was little to no English on the cans. I decided to go with the Vietnam brand instead of Raid – it was ¼ the price. Plus – it made me laugh…the one piece of English on the can read “kills most pets”. I had no doubt that if it killed most pets that it would kill my ants…sold. As a side note, I was assuming it meant pests…at least I hope so! I picked up a jar of pasta sauce and headed to home. I walked past the hookers at the brothel in my alley and smiled nicely and said Sin Chao (hello)…ahhhh…neighbors.

I sprayed for ants, and watched old MTV videos from the 80’s on tv while my pasta cooked. Since I have no forks in the apartment, I ate my pasta and sauce with chop sticks sitting in front of the tv watching Pat Benatar. I even made myself a little Gin and Tonic; without ice of course.

Finally, I put the padlock on the door and went up to bed…just another normal day in Vietnam.

You don't need to know Vietnamese to understand this sign!

It’s nice to know that other places around the world invent holidays for the flower industry. I have just experienced my first Teacher’s Day in Vietnam! November 20th is a major holiday here in Vietnam; Teacher’s Day. Granted – you don’t get the day off of work, but it is well celebrated. In fact, it’s the first holiday that I actually ‘qualify’ for. I have often felt a bit cheated on Mother’s day, and of course Valentine’s day is non-existent for me – there is no ‘single woman’ holiday, nor is there a vagabond holiday, so finally I have found a holiday that I qualify for; Teacher’s Day!

I started seeing the signs up as I was sitting at a stop light on the back of the motorbike. I can’t read Vietnamese – but the painting of the young lady with a chalk board and A, B, C written on it was all I needed to understand that it was a teacher. It had the date 20-11-08 written on it. I tucked away the information in my brain and didn’t really think about it much again.

On the 20th, the students poured into class baring flowers and colorfully foil wrapped presents. I was a bit beside myself as I wasn’t really sure what to expect on teacher’s day, but I wasn’t expecting any outpouring of gratitude or gifts like this! My beginner class did a little presentation in class and gave me a beautiful bouquet of flowers and a lovely set of laquerware boxes that said Happy Teacher Day on them with the date. At break time it was time to celebrate with food. Asian rice cakes, crackers, dried fruit, and some of the cutest marshmallow treats I’ve ever seen! Due to the sugar high, I tried to rework my lesson plan on the fly to incorporate some more fun games into the 2nd half as I knew there was no way I was going to be able to get them to concentrate on the present continuous verb form after a dozen sugary marshmallows! Or maybe it was me that wouldn’t be able to concentrate –who knows.

After class one of the girls came up to my desk and gave me another gift from her as the other gifts were from the whole class. When I opened up the pink lacey box, I found a pair of shoes; now that was definitely the last thing I expected. My insecure side wondered if she hated my shoes so much that she thought I should have new ones?! At the same time I was actually flattered that she thought I had size 6 feet! Oh, Asians have no idea what it’s like to be a size 9! It was definitely the thought that counted when it came to this gift!

My elementary class also showed up with gifts and flowers. I even received a standing ovation from them…the whole thing kind of took my breath away. They also had a lovely wrapped gift for me – a handbag! At least size didn’t matter for this gift. Both the shoes and the handbag were Vietnamese crafted (i.e. made of plastic), but they were both cute nonetheless.

The students begged me to let them take me out for coffee, so I couldn’t turn them down; we finished class early that day to celebrate this fabulous holiday that was all about ME! I told them that I would end class early and go to coffee on one condition, everyone would have to speak English over coffee! They begrudgingly agreed.

I love little moments where you realize something unexpected. As I grow older, I find that those moments are precious because they are few and far between. Therefore, Teacher’s Day was a wonderful emotional surprise just when I needed it most.

Bringing home the bacon...literally

There’s a reason it’s called Work.

Work is still work. After two years of being out of work, my mini retirement has ended for a while. There’s a part of me that is happy that I have a place to settle for a bit, however there’s a larger part of me that would rather stay unemployed and gallivanting around the globe.

Working again has really thrown me for a loop. Sure, I have to get up everyday and be somewhere; and I have a ‘boss’ again. But that’s not the surprising stuff. The part that took me by surprise was this feeling that I’m selling myself short. I look around at my new ‘peers’ and see they are just out of college. They are all wonderful teachers (better than I can ever hope to be!), but I can’t help but wonder if they are striving for a career similar to the one I gave up. I’ve had this lump in my throat all week, wondering if I have done the right thing – or wondering if I should be striving to do more. Have I thrown away my MBA and work experience; tossed it aside so that I can teach? Am I really giving up a 14 year career to make $18 an hour? Or is it that I just don’t want to have the destructive corporate experience I had before; the kind where you’re married to the company. Time will tell on that question – I will be pondering this for months no doubt. In the meantime, I have a small paycheck.

The school itself is nice and full of resources. I have 3 classes I’m teaching – one of which is a complete beginner’s class. I recall all of those times people asked me how in the world I could teach English in Vietnam if I didn’t know Vietnamese. I would always shrug the question off and say – you don’t need to be able to speak Vietnamese to teach English! Now I’m sitting here after week one going – damn – this is hard – it sure would be easier if I knew some Vietnamese!

It’s been over 6 months since I actually took my teaching course, so my first day back in a classroom was a bit terrifying. Sure, I taught in Nepal, but that kind of teaching is totally different. These Vietnamese students are actually paying to go to language school, they have expectations. They aren’t happy simply staring at me in amazement. Well, actually maybe they are – one of my students has a total crush on me which is a little concerning considering I look like a sweaty mess most days; PLUS I could be his mother.

In addition to my beginners, I also teach an elementary class (just a hair bit more English understanding than beginners) and a writing class. Yes, that’s right – a writing class. I know, I know – you are all hoping that I learn something while teaching that class. Actually the writing class is simply a class on how to write effective paragraphs/essays for English language tests. I’m just trying to stay one class ahead of what I’m teaching. It’s been an adventure as learning about paragraph formation has taken me back to 4th grade I think.

I wish I could say that it was all great so far, but it’s honestly a lot of change to manage in my life. If you top that off with the fact that I’m a hopeless type A perfectionist it makes for a terrible combination. I really wish I could be satisfied with just getting by – but I can’t. So I spend hours and hours at work which then means that I’m actually making about $10 an hour and one has to wonder…is it worth it?

This is only the first few weeks, so I will continue to tell myself to be patient and not think too much, but it’s more challenging than any of you can imagine.

Nepalese Secondary School

Dhal Bhat Days – vol13
9/15/08

While in Nepal I heard from my old students in India; they wished me a happy teacher day via email; it took me completely off guard, and shook me up a bit . It had been a year ago that I was there living in Delhi teaching my wonderful group of young adults that I become so attached to. While in Nepal I heard about the bombings in Delhi and emailed each of them to make sure they were ok and their families were safe. They all wrote back with positive responses letting me know they were fine. However, one note stuck out to me, a note from one of my favorite students, Ashish.

Respected Ma’am,
Thank you! for encouraging me and the credit for all this improvement is your hard work with us and the dedication you have to improve our life. Today’s world nobody wants to help other but you did it. It is really nice to hear that you are going to teach students, i now you will do it excellently. Yes nowadays I am working with an U.K based charity organisation ( MKC – ROKO CANCER ) as a computer operator and where i have to use English to mailing and communicate with my colleges.I have to use my Internet Browsing, and Website Designing Skills in our website. Now we can keep in touch because I have freedom to check my mails regularly. The most important thing is that I am enjoying my job, even they are paying me a lot less which I actually have to get. I hope you are well and having fun…
Even now I am working but I still need your concern and guidance forever….

This is why I do it. This is why I brave leaches, spiders, rats, cow shit, and no communicating…for a moment like this which is absolutely priceless to me. I would pull off a thousand leaches for the feeling that runs through my body when I read this.

Granted, my volunteering experience in Nepal was vastly different than my experience in India, but I know that I made some sort of impact; whether it was teaching English or simply cultural exchange.

Sun-kissed fruit for sale

Nepal was breathtaking and infuriating at the same time. A small country that is rich in tradition and culture, but economically poor. My old vision of Nepal was Mt. Everest and mountains; a tourist rich area that was well known around the world. However, my departing impressions of Nepal doesn’t really have anything to do with mountains or terrain – it has to do with people. People eager to learn about others, people satisfied with very little, people who live a simple life. The tourists who travel to Nepal are hearty and strong, they have to be, as Nepal is not a place for the weak. You can’t come to Nepal just to look, you need to become involved in Nepal. If you are not willing to become involved with the local people and interact, then I say, go to Switzerland and look at the mountains. However, if you are willing to put yourself out there and meet the locals, interact with the culture, then you’ve really succeeded at traveling in Nepal.

Nepal shocked me into the space I needed to be in for my move to Vietnam and for that, I’m grateful. All of these challenging experiences prepare me for the next, and the next, and the next.

To learn more about the Hands for Help Nepal NGO that I volunteered with, please check out their website at http://handsforhelp.org.np/
Hands for Help is doing a great job at really making volunteering work rewarding. For them, it’s less about the vacation and more about the volunteering, which is exactly what I was looking for. However, even though it was no posh vacation, it was filled with cultural experiences that I will never forget! Check them out if you are looking to do something meaningful and see another part of the world!  They have a variety of great programs ranging from short term to long term.  They are a great bunch of people!

Dhal Bhat Days – Vol. 10
9/10/08

To see all of the snapshots of the ‘last day’ activities – click here! (opens new window)

Time is very powerful. In fact, I think it’s the most powerful thing in this universe. Time heals feelings, it causes us to forget, and with time; everything gets better. My time in Puma felt like it moved slowly, especially at first. I agonized about how I would ever survive the two weeks living in conditions that were completely foreign to my mindset. Then time arrived. Over time, I began to accept my new surroundings and even grow to appreciate the hardships and the simplicity. Time made me forget my old expectations and allowed me to set new ones. Because of time, I survived this challenge; as I do all challenges. Now I find that it is time to leave Puma and my little school high on the hill nestled between snow capped mountains; thanks to time, I’m finding it hard to go.

Today was my last day at the Puma Primary school with my kids that I have come to love. I got up early to try to catch the sunrise on the stoop of the village. I was hoping for an amazing photo opportunity of the sun rising above the mountains, but instead I got a game show. What’s behind door #1? However, there were no doors, instead it was big, fluffy clouds and behind them somewhere are magnificent snow covered mountains towering to heights of 20,00 to 24,000 ft. Sometimes Mother Nature would be kind and give me a little glimpse and I would look in awe thinking “this was here the whole time and I didn’t even know it.” I realized that the whole village of Puma is surrounded by these mountains, yet I never saw it with my own eyes; I had to take the local’s words for it.

I went back to the house and had my breakfast snack of popcorn and tea. As I ate the rain started to fall cooling everything off a bit and bringing the leaches. I fantasized about having M&M’s with the popcorn but was thankful for the popcorn regardless! Despite the rain, I had to head to the local ‘watering hole’ and wash my hair. Seemed kind of silly in the rain – but no more silly to me than having to go bath in public with my shorts and tshirt on. As I washed my hair at the water spicket dumping cold water on my head, I suddenly looked up and realized that I was attracting a crowd. 3 young teenage girls sat there and watched me unabashedly. They didn’t look away when I caught them staring – they just kept their fixed gaze. It’s a strange feeling to have people watch you bath, but I had gotten used to it by now. One of the girls even went as far as pointing out some soap I missed when I was rinsing; how very kind of her.

Me in traditional Gurung dress

I arrived back to the house where Didi used me as her American Girl doll; well, actually a Nepalese Girl Doll I suppose. She brought me a lunghi (wrap skirt) that was trimmed in gold and a traditional jacket that had as many ties as a straight jacket. Next came the jewelry – bracelets and a very long green necklace – the traditional outfit for a Kumari woman. Finally, she topped it off with a tilak, a mark of auspiciousness. It is put on the forehead with sandal past, sacred ashes or red tumeric. I had been transformed for my last day of school.

As I walked the school all of the kids stood on the wall and held flowers welcoming me with the chorus of Namaste’s. Yes, I already had that familiar tightening of the throat and tears welling up in my eyes. But it was too early for that; I had to get it under control.

I brought all of my electronics that day – 2 cameras, and my laptop. This was the most electronics that Puma had ever been exposed to. For many of these children, this was the first time they had ever seen a laptop. I put it on the desk and proceeded to show them pictures of my family, my friends, my home, my (former) cat, and pictures of America. They all crowded around, pushing each other to get a glimpse of a world that they had never really seen. They watched the screen magically move through photos with background music; and I watched them. I watched their faces display utter amazement; it was a touching feeling to think that I was exposing them to something that is so normal to most of us. I watched them push, kick and fight their way closer so they could see. Next I showed the photos of them that I had been taking for the past two weeks. They screamed in glee when they saw themselves. The touching thing is that the adults/teachers were just as mesmerized by the children. Today, I had helped the world become a little more global – a good feeling.

Students receiving their pens and notebooks

After teaching in the morning, the afternoon was left for special festivities. Thanks to the donations of international charities, all of the school children in Puma received a pen and 12 notebooks. This was a big event and the local politicians were even invited to be a part of the ceremony! The various chairmen/women of the village attended the festivities and handed out the notebooks and pens to each child individually as well as provided each one with a tilak. At the end I topped it off with giving each of them a pencil. It was like Christmas morning for these kids, the gifts were enthusiastically received!

The Principal tying my khata

They asked me to come back and stay longer, but mainly they asked me to never forget Puma. Lord knows thee is no chance of that ever happening! The gratitude was overwhelming for me. With my neck weighted down by flowers, the Principal gave me a a final gift, a khata.   A khata is a white, silk ceremonial scarf symbolizing goodwill, auspiciousness, and compassion. It is given during special occasions and welcomes and departures. It was a beautiful gesture and the whole thing took me by surprise. The kids sang songs and we all took pictures. I was moved by the outpouring of blessings that I felt and the personal accomplishment of making the absolute best of a challenging situation.

Didi, I, and my massive flowers

The main reason why I was in Nepal was to volunteer and make a cultural connection. Unbeknownst to be this adventure also came with spiders, leaches, and hardship. However it was worth every moment, ever breakdown, every struggle, every charade for the feeling that I’m feeling now.

Dhal Bhat Days – Vol. 8
9/8/08

The Primary School surrounded by mountains

To see snapshots of the school and the kids – click here! (opens new window)

To view all Village Photography click here! (opens new window)

The whole reason I came to Nepal was to volunteer and teach. In some way I was trying to recapture my rewarding experience that I had in Delhi last year I suppose. When I arrived however, I quickly realized that the teaching was a bit secondary to my culture shock that I was experiencing. Considering my new living environment in Puma, teaching was really the least of my concerns. I think I was so caught up in my own fears that I didn’t really put a lot of effort into worrying about teaching the children. That doesn’t mean that I didn’t put a lot of planning and thought into it, I certainly spent hours on the porch planning my lessons for each class the next day, but the teaching seemed secondary to me for some reason. I fell into a good groove with the teaching and it was very rewarding. A typical school day went something like this…

The kids awaiting for me to arrive

I go to school at 10am, and as soon as I start getting close to the little school high on the hill, I hear it. It is faint at first, but gains volume with each muddy step I take past the buffalos.
“Miss….Miss…”
“Namaste Miss”
“Miss, Miss, Goohd Moating!”
The kids gather in the yard and eagerly awaited my arrival. There’s a part of me that simply thinks they like watching me try to navigate my way through the steep rocks, the buffalos, the buffalo shit and the mud. Today, one of the boys came to my rescue and ‘shoo’d’ the buffalo out of my path as I was a bit scared to walk by a buffalo that was staring me down; that’s not an everyday occurrence for me and simply telling them to go away doesn’t quite work.

After greeting all of the kids with Namaste’s and ‘How are you?”, I take a seat inside with the teachers for about 20 minutes and I ask the principle what periods I can teach that day. Today he surprised me and said “No teach today.”
“What? No teach?” I reply a bit dazed and confused
“Yes, no teach.” He repeats
I look at him with a puzzled look wondering if I’ve done something wrong or if I just am misunderstanding him which is the typical situation
He takes the Nepali calendar (which is lunar) off the wall and points to a day on the calendar which I cannot read and says, “This today” then he moves his finger to some fine print in Nepalese script on today’s date and says “today for games”.
“Game day? What is that?” I reply in a surprised manner wondering if Bob Barker was going to show up with his prize wheel.

Only the boys showed up during Teej

As a side note, I really shouldn’t be surprised at all about game day. Since I’ve been here there have been 2 holidays and now one game day – this is all in the course of 1 ½ wks. It seems to me there is not a ton of school going on. The two holidays were special festivals for women…sounds great…right? Not so much. As I inquired more and more about Teej, I learned that it was a holiday celebrating women, but it was less of a holiday that celebrated women, and more of a holiday that celebrated women’s commitment to men. Red flag! What? I had to pause and try to put my western views aside; I tried to bite my lip as I inquired more about this subservient festival. Apparently, no on worked or went to school that day and instead the women dressed in red and visited the temple making offerings to the various Gods (sorry, there are really too many for me to keep up with the specifics), and the women fasted all day. Call me crazy, but fasting doesn’t sound like any type of holiday to me. These acts were to show the women’s devotion to their husbands and brothers. Two days after the fasting, the women once again had to go to temple and fast in the morning. This Theet Part II took me by surprise when only the boys showed up to school. The principal was once again left trying to explain why I wasn’t teaching that day. Instead of coming to school the women in the village did chores, cut buffalo grass, fetched water, watched the buffalo/goats, worked in the rice fields, etc.
Here’s a bit more official description:

“Teej” is the fasting festival for women. It takes place in August or early September. The festival is a three-day long celebration that combines sumptuous feasts as well as rigid fasting. Through this religious fasting, hindu women pray for marital bliss, well being of their spouse and children and purification of their own body and soul

When we did have class, I typically taught for an hour for each class. There were three classes of children; age 6/7, age 8/9, and age 10. Each were at different level of English, which basically meant the 10 yr olds knew more vocabulary than the younger kids and they could read the Roman letters better. The youngest kids really had to start at square one and we focused on colors, drawing, songs, and body parts.

I had to be rather inventive as the classrooms were bare; and the kids had minimal supplies (sometimes a pencil and paper). The only items in the classrooms were an old chalkboard with pieces of chalk that were no larger than ½ inch in length. I learned quickly that the teaching periods were very, very lose; nothing was very structured at all – at least in my western eyes there wasn’t a lot of structure.

The game of Cat and Rat!

Game day turned out to be a lot of fun. They taught me Nepalese songs about buffalos and rice fields. There was even a song about some man who was divorcing his wife, yet I’m a bit suspicious that I might have misunderstood the translation of that one! After the singing, we started to play organized games. First we played musical chairs….yet I looked around in confusion as there were no chairs. Soon the children were all running around gathering big stones; the substitute for chairs. Now the next hurdle was music…there’s no electricity at the school, so I wasn’t quite sure how they were accomplishing the musical part – but they brought out a drum and someone pounded on the drum as we all went around from rock to rock in a circle. I didn’t fare too well in the game as I’m not very good at running in flip flops whilst the kids were very adept to running in their bare feet – I didn’t stand a chance!

See video of the kids singing Nepalese songs for me – this one is about water I think!

The next game I had a chance at winning because it was in English! The principle drew a big circle in the dirt with a stick and we all gathered around it and played In/Out. The principle would say ‘in’ or ‘out and we would follow the instructions jumping in and out of the circle. Eventually he would trick someone and they would be out of the game. I stayed in the game until the last 5 kids and was eliminated; maybe I would have done better if it was in Nepalese. My lack of conversation in Puma has obviously impaired my English!

See video of the kids playing a game of tag!

Finally they played a game called Cat and Rat. I loved the fact that they used the term rat instead mouse. It was a type of tag and I sat that one out as I had more fun taking pictures of it! I taught them how to play hopscotch and the Hokie Pokie…in which they all stood there and stared at me at first as I ‘shook it all about’..but eventually joined in! Thank god as I was feeling rather silly! The principle handed out prizes and the kids went home early that day.

How can you resist these faces?!

I stayed around and talked to the teachers for a while. The main teachers room was full of stacks and stacks of books that had been donated from World Vision and other organizations. I asked the principle what they were going to do with the books and he referred to putting them in the library.
“What, there’s a library?” I remarked
He got a key and took me to the room next door and showed me a newly painted room in red, blue, green and yellow. He told me that this is to be the library. I was rather impressed and asked him where all of the furniture was and when it will be completed. He explained that the shelving, tables, and remaining items were down in Besisharha and that they didn’t not have the funds yet to bring the remaining furniture up to Puma via Jeep. I asked him how expensive it was to have the Jeep bring up the furniture and he said that is was 2,000 Rupees ($30 US ).

I went back to Didi’s that night and thought a bit about the stacks of books and the unfinished library. After living in Puma for 1 ½ weeks, I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t get as much time as I would like to actually teach the children due to festival schedule, game days, and trips to other villages. I counted up my Rupees and decided that I would provide the funding to get the last load of library equipment to the school. I felt like it was a way to provide more help considering I hadn’t done as much teaching as I originally thought I would. It doesn’t take long for the kids and the people of Puma to occupy a piece of your heart in this environment, and I wanted to provide as much as I could for them.

It seemed like the logical thing to do. After all, $30 is 3 mixed drinks in NYC and giving these kids access to books is much more important to me than martinis!

Barber of Barbot

I thought I would give you all a break from the writing and present my photography from the villages I visited. This is the ‘best of’ the village photography.

 View my Nepal Village Photography at my Global Photography website!

Fee free to browse around and remember that I sell these prints!  If you are at all interested in adding some art to your walls, or simply supporting me, please click on that shopping cart!

Kids of Puma

Dhal Bhat Days – Vol. 5
9/3/08

I hit a low today. I think it was due to many different things; but what affects me the most is not being able to have any type of conversation with anyone. I’m not simply sitting here silent – I am trying to form together a few words whenever I can, but it is very hard to get a question out or a sentence out when you really just know the words for rain, good, small, big, eat, house, leach, you, my, tomorrow, mother, sister, father, I and water. Great if I want to say “you eat tomorrow” or “I eat leach” or “mother rain water”…but you can’t do much more than that with my limited Nepalese vocabulary. I’ve been writing down my questions in the hopes that when someone does come by that knows any English, I can start to ask them all of my questions.

The day started like normal, I woke up to the sounds of a rooster and the smell of cow shit. As a side note, I think that me having to sleep over the cow barn is the universe’s way of payback. When I was a kid, we’d take family vacations and when we went by cow barns, I would profess to love the smell of the cow barn. I would sniff loudly and say how good it smelled; leaving my brother and sister utterly disgusted. Actually I’m sure that I didn’t really like the smell – but what I did like is that it pissed my brother and sister off. When you are the youngest you will do anything to make your brother and sister mad. If they liked something, I didn’t. If they hated something, I liked it. So, I hope my brother and sister are reading this as they should be happy now that karma has come my way in the village of Puma as I sleep over the smelly cow stall.

Children in the village

I got up and went to the bathroom as my bladder was about to burst since I would push my bladder to the limit by not getting up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. Else I would have to go outside in the pouring rain, pitch dark, and brave the leaches and huge spider; instead I would just hold it. I went to the outhouse and spotted Charlotte (I had to give the spider a name so it would seem less intimidating), and that’s when I noticed that Charlotte had invited a friend into her home (my bathroom) –another huge spider. Seriously – was I being tested? So I named this one Wilbur and did my business. I remembered to check my feet for leaches afterward and washed up a bit.

My intention today was to finally take a ‘shower’. However this wasn’t as easy as one would think. First, with no plumbing, there is no shower. Instead there is a pubic wash area where the water flows. Everyone goes to this area and washes clothes, their bodies, and gather water for their home in huge metal jugs. You can imagine my concern when I was trying to figure out exactly how to go about this public bath. Do you bath with your clothes on? Did you ‘shower’ under the spout or take a bucket with you and do the ‘bucket shower’? Is there a line? What is the bathing etiquette? I had millions of questions but no way to really ask them. Sure, I tried charades, but that didn’t get me too far. So I decided to go one more day without a shower in the hopes that I would find someone that I could ask my questions to. I put on some baby powder instead.

I taught all day today and it went fine, yet it was challenging as usual as the kids vary in their abilities. Plus they are like me learning Nepali; they know vocabulary words, but don’t know how to put them together in a sentence. They love to watch me and mimic me though; that can be hours of fun. After school I said goodbye to the kids and arrived back at my house and hit a low. I sat there and was completely frustrated that I couldn’t talk to anyone in a complete sentence. Plus, what seems to piss me off more is that every time I am trying to recall a word in Nepalese, the Italian word pops into my head. Hell, I couldn’t seem to remember the Italian when I was trying to learn Italian a year ago, but now it seems to just come back to me – when it does me absolutely no good. In fact I lay awake at night and think of a bunch of Italian words and I can normally remember them with ease. I think my brain is misfiring.

Didi's Nephew

After trying once again to have the conversation with Didi about the ‘public’ shower and how to go about it, I was defeated. I had decided that I would wear my running shorts and jog bra up there if I had to and figure out how to do it regardless. As the night began to fall, two kids came over to the house. They were older teenagers and nicely dressed. Didi explained that the kids were her niece and nephew (when I say explained…I mean more like somehow said the word sister and kid and I put together the rest). This was her way of providing me some answers to my charade questions. She had her niece and nephew come by who knew more English then she did. After all, the youth of the world typically know more English then their elders. It wasn’t as if conversation easily flowed – but we got through it and I have a better idea of how to go about bathing now. In addition I was able to get through a number of other questions that I had such as will the spider in the bathroom pounce on me? They assured me that the spider will not bite me. However, the most important thing is that for the first time, I was having a conversation – and I could laugh and feel a bit human again. Thank god for youth.

I’ve done it.

I completed a step towards my new future.

I am now CELTA certified to teach ESL (English as a Second Language) through Cambridge University. It was a tough month – full of ups and downs…and growth. I firmly believe that when you challenge yourself – you realize what you are made of. You appreciate little things. You struggle, but when you persevere there’s really no better feeling. This last month has made me realize many things, some good, some a bit disturbing. Yet the self awareness that it has provided has been immeasurable.

Here’s my report card on what I have learned after a month of returning back to the classroom to become certified to teach ESL:

English – B
I have spent the past month taking a step back – a step back in my brain to 2nd – 5th grade. I have been relearning this lovely English language of ours. It’s actually fascinating to look at the English language and teaching through the eyes of an adult. It makes you appreciate many things – mainly the fact that you were ever able to learn how to use all of these complicated rules in English and how they become second nature in our brain. I honestly have no idea how it happens- it’s some kind of miracle that we can decipher when to use the future form of verbs so effortlessly. Sometimes I think it would be easier to part the Red Sea. As I studied the future forms to prepare for my class, I was amazed as I learned the complicated rules as to when we use ‘be going to’,‘will’, ‘future continuous’, ‘present continuous’ and ‘present simple’ verbs to speak about the future. In fact – as I read the rules, I had to actually sit back and think about how I spoke and somehow decipher these unknown rules somehow effortlessly. I found myself trying to listen to people on the subway – wondering if they fully knew why there were using ‘going to’ instead of ‘will be’.
After teaching lessons on various parts of grammar, I became reacquainted with modal verbs, future forms, quantifiers, countable/uncountable nouns, auxiliary verbs, past participles, and progressive verbs. These things did not come easy – it was many hours of toiling through grammar books making sure I understood it before I had to get up in front of students and teach it – trying to avoid my biggest fear in all of teaching…being asked a question I can’t answer. I found it a bit funny and disturbing that I spent most of my corporate career in fear of not knowing enough about technical terms in IT, and now I’m still worrying – about grammar this time. I guess the worry never stops – does it?

Foreign Studies – B+
As I met my students, they would tell me where they were from – Italy, Japan, Ukraine, Chile, Argentina, Brazil, Spain, Portugal, and Russia – I had an overwhelming feeling of excitement. In my head I had a ton of questions for each of them – why were they here, what did they think of the US, what did they do in their home country, what city did they live in, was this their first trip to the US, did they miss their home…the list could go on and on. I was overwhelmed with excitement about meeting people from other cultures again – it reminded me of my travels. I simply wanted to learn more about them and I wanted to help them in any way I could. I thought about why meeting someone from Italy or Ukraine excited me more than meeting someone from Queens or the Upper East Side. I decided that I am just wired to be international and inquisitive. I wish I could get as excited about my own country as I do about other countries – but I just can’t. The fact is that I love to learn about and interact with other cultures. It’s unpredictable – and that’s what I love most. It was soothing to me to realize that I still had a thirst for foreign experiences and people. I often get worried that being back in the US will suck that thirst right out of me and turn me into the Sahara Desert. This month I proved to myself that wasn’t the case.

Conduct – C+
I realized once again that I’m not a morning person. No matter how hard I try – it’s just not possible for me to be excited or energetic in the morning. It was a shock to my system to have to be up at an early hour every day. I had to commute with other zombie like NY commuters on overcrowded subways. I had to try to not become a zombie like them. However – some days they won – and I was just as evil and hollow as they were. Everyone stared into the distance with their ipod headphones in their ears. I often would look around the subway thinking that we all looked like aliens with our white earbuds , solemn faces, and glazed over eyes – looking as if we were on the train to hell. I realized that I didn’t miss this commuter life one bit…not a single thread. Yet for a month I had to be one of them again.
Most importantly – I proved to myself that old habits never die. When I sat down with one of my teachers for my mid month evaluation – her first sentence to me was “You are a perfectionist, aren’t you?” I felt as if I was a recipient of some kind of addict intervention at that point in time. “Yes, my name is Sherry and I am, and will always be, an over achiever.” Crap.
As much as I want to be laid back and serene, I can’t. This course brought out the person I thought I had left behind. Little did I know that I couldn’t really shake that person…it is engrained in me. Now – this isn’t a terrible thing, at least I’m self aware enough to realize that I’m an over achiever…there’s got to be something good to that – right? Even though I was hard on myself this month, and I hibernated in my apartment every night working on homework and lesson planng, it did all pay off. It reminded me that no matter what challenges are ahead of me – I will always find a way to survive, I am too much of an over achiever to ever accept failure – and that – is a good thing.

Finance – B
I know that the path I am choosing (travel, overseas living, teaching esl, writing, photography) for my life isn’t full of riches or prestige. However it provides me something that I haven’t really had before – a future that I am actually excited about. Yet I found myself looking reality in the face this last month and I realized why it seems so very difficult for people to follow their dreams. Following dreams is never easy. If I wanted easy – I would be going back to a corporate job working in information technology. I would continue to have restless nights, anxiety dreams, and stomach issues. I was confronted this last month with the reality of my decision…I can teach ESL for a little less than ¼ of what I could make doing IT consulting. That’s a blow…one that leaves you gasping for air as if my brother had dropped me during one of our crazy circus acts gone wrong and I had the wind knocked out of me. So – here’s the big decision – money or happiness. I reminded myself that if I was in it for money…then I’d still be in my office in mid town Manhattan worrying about reviews, budgets, and handbags. I’m happy with my decision to pursue a new direction – yet when you are confronted with it – you have to stop and think for a second…you’d be crazy not to. Luckily – I didn’t have to think too long…I know where I belong. Life is too short to be unhappy.

Future Outlook – A
As I sat through hours of lectures from our teachers and taught various classes myself, there was one thing that was a constant – a smile (except for in the morning hours of course!). I was smiling because I realized that I do love teaching, and the thought of teaching overseas. Simply getting up in front of the students excited me. I was generally overjoyed to teach them – even though I was equally terrified that I would screw the whole thing up and they would ask me questions I didn’t know the answer to.
I can’t ever remember sitting in my office in any of my past jobs and being excited about how I was contributing to someone of something. Overall – I had a feeling of excitement – excitement for what I was learning, what I was teaching, and what my future held.

I have entered the terrifying world of responsibility again. I may go into shock. I actually have to set my alarm every day and be somewhere by 9AM, and I don’t get back home until 5:30PM. Unfortunately – this new lifestyle is not making me any money – but it’s the path to my ticket back out on the road!

If you are an active reader of the blog, then you have solved the riddle above – if not, then you may be confused – wondering if I have sold out and set back to a desk job writing and sending emails all day. Do you really think I would give up that easy – no, not me. Or maybe you are wondering if I have taken a job at Starbucks in order to get medical insurance. That would actually be a good guess, considering I have seriously thought about that option in order to be insured – but you would be wrong.

I have begun my 4 week intensive course in learning how to teach ESL (English as a Second Language) and I am in shock.

I have to get up and be somewhere every day
I can’t wear my sweatpants all day
I have to ride the subway at peak hours among the entire car of zombie-like commuters. Not a single person looks happy on their commute – it’s like looking at the living dead.
I have tons of homework – I wake up in the middle of the night thinking about modal verbs.
I had to teach the first day
I realize that I know nothing about English grammar…nothing. Sure, I can speak it, but explaining it is like me trying to explain how to put together a rocket for NASA….a disaster that inevitably will crash and burn.
I had to dig out a dictionary for the first time in 10 years. (seriously – when was the last time you ever looked a word up in the dictionary?)

However, on the positive side of things, the moment I stood up in front of the class and started teaching, I remembered how much I loved it. My memories of India came flooding back to me. I enjoyed learning about where the students were from and it made me long to get back out on the road. It felt as if my travels were coming full circle in a way – it wasn’t but a few months ago that I was the student trying to learn Italian – and now I’m teaching Italians (and many other nationalities) English – life can be strange.

Every morning I sit through 3 hours of lecture on how to actually teach, and the afternoons are spent teaching real students. What this course doesn’t include is a grammar education – no one is teaching me sentence structure, verb tenses, etc. However, you can bet that when I am teaching a grammar lesson to the students I have read every piece of material I could find on the grammar rules so that I won’t get tripped up. Therefore in a roundabout way – I’m learning.

The class leaves me absolutely fascinated with language itself. How we ever learned it, how others learn multiple languages, the sounds of words, the stress of words. We use all of this but never ever thing about it. Now – I am forced to think about it and it’s rather fun. This new student life hasn’t left me much time to do other things recently. Being an overachiever pretty much guarantees that I have my head stuck in a book at night trying to be the absolute best, smartest, ESL teacher ever…some habits die hard – and Type A personalities are hard to change.

Being back in school is a humbling experience – but I believe that it will lead to great things. In fact – it’s fun to try to put my ‘plan’ in motion. I’ve been floundering here in NYC, not really sure where I fit in and no real plan. Now I feel like I have purpose again. I’m aching to get back and explore again, and this is my means to that end.

Little girl in the slums of Delhi

For the ‘best of’ Delhi Photography – click here!

For the ‘best of’ Agra and Taj Mahal Photography – click here!

For the ‘best of’ Rajasthan Photography – click here!

I wasn’t supposed to be here, in India that is. When I left the US a year ago I had many people ask me if I was going to India on my around the world tour. I said “No, I don’t want to go to India, and I certainly don’t want to go solo. I think it would be too hard for me and I would be frustrated.” For some reason India seemed liked the big leagues of travel. I had heard stories, and none of them were particularly good. In May of this year when I had come up with this crazy idea of going to India and volunteering, it still must have taken me a week to actually click on the ‘purchase’ button on CCS website. I was on the fence – afraid that I would hate India and end up being miserable for 5 weeks. I would ask my friend Natasha every day…should I do it? Am I crazy? What if I hate it?

I look back on those days and chuckle now. Staying and living in a country for a month is a unique opportunity, it gives you the chance to become culturally integrated, and to really learn about day to day life. One of the most important things that I learned is that for all the reasons that I thought I would hate India, I loved it. This goes hand in hand with the fact that India is the land of contrasts. I had read about the contrasts many times in various books and articles – I understood it – but I didn’t really understand it until now. The contrasts exist everywhere…and it’s a lot for our Western minds to take in and make sense of which is why I think that India gets a bad rap.

Colorful vs. Dirty
India is not afraid of color – it embraces color. The sari’s are bright purple, orange, yellow, pink, blue, or green. The dupatees are colorful and normally adorned with some sort of shimery sequins. Wrists, arms, ankles, toes, and noses are adorned with blingy bangels and rings. You don’t see women wearing black, grey, or navy blue…ever. Even the men dress in colorful patterned shirts. I personally think that in a land of 1.2 billion people, everyone is trying to find their way to stick out from the crowd…and that’s where the color comes in. There’s nothing more beautiful than seeing a group of women in India, dressed in the colors of the rainbow walking together…it makes the place feel alive. The woman riding side saddle on the back of a motor scooter…her colorful sari blowing in the wind, brings a smile across my face. You feel like you’ve just entered the inside of a rainbow – and everyone is searching for the pot of gold. Contrast that with the garbage everywhere, piled up high in the middle of a sidewalk, next to a restaurant, sometimes on fire, or sometimes just rotting away. Various dogs and cows are nosing through the piles trying to find food. Scratch that…the various people nosing through it trying to find food. When you come in from walking out in the market you have a layer of dust on you, your eyes sting with the pollution. Now imagine that same group of lovely ladies in their rainbow of saris and bangles walking down the pollution filled street by a huge pile of burning garbage outside a 5 star hotel.

Rich vs. Poor
This is probably the largest and most confusing contrast in the country. There are 1.2 billion people in India. It has the 2nd largest population of billionaires, yet 75% of the people are living on less than $2 a day. Add the concept of the caste system and the theory of karma to this and you’ve also got people who don’t think badly of the poor, in fact – it’s accepted that if you are poor, that’s just your lot in life – that’s how it’s meant to be. One did not do anything wrong (at least in this life) to get into this poor position, it is what it is. In contrast, in the western world we tend to look at down upon the poor as lazy – people who can’t get a job or hold on to a job, we generally think they should try harder, be sober, work at being a functioning member of society. This makes it very hard for westerners to understand and see the poor and destitute every day. Every day I would be driven to my placement. We would go under a large underpass of a highway with a 4 leaf clover ramp design that had nice well-kept grass – it looked nice. However – one day I noticed a bunch of people just sitting in the green area as if it were a city park – not a clover ramp. They were out there eating. It struck me as odd. I looked closer the next time we passed here and noticed little poorly made cots under the overpass. As my eyes achieved focused clarity – I realized that there were tons of little cots and people living under the overpass; a whole community of sorts. I’m not sure why this struck me as strange, as we have people living under bridges in the US – but this was a whole functioning community, not just 1 or 2 homeless people. I thought to myself…that’s not a bad place to live – at least they have shade, and a park like setting.

One of the strange things I saw as I drove around Delhi was the huge government estates or private estates – normally built around some large 5 star hotel. However, around the corner was a slum. There was no ‘bad part of town’…it was all completely intermixed. One theory on that is that all of the people living in the slums were doing odd jobs for the rich. Everyone had their specialty – the laundry guy, the trash guy, the cook, the driver, the ironing man, and the gardener. These people didn’t really have the means to have a long commute – so out of necessity they lived nearby. Since the poor are accepted in India and not looked down upon, no one really cared that the two communities were intermixed.

Good Smell vs. Rancid Smell
They say that India is an assault on all of you senses. As you walk through the markets you are immersed in the smell of masala (mixture of spices) tickling you nose and evoking memories of Indian restaurants in NYC. You dodge young boys bringing hot glasses of chai to shop keepers. A milky, spicy tea mixture which tastes better than anything Starbucks could ever dream of making. The smell of flowers frequently wafts through the air especially near the temples. Men sit outside of the temples busy making necklaces of aromatic orange flowers. You walk along inhaling it all – intoxicating. In contrast, as you walk along in that intoxicating haze, all of a sudden it can hit you like a brick wall…the smell of urine. There are too many people and not enough toilets in India – forcing people to go anywhere and everywhere. Men pee everywhere – there’s really no modesty and nowhere off limits. I saw little boys peeing off an overpass into a river and men (men with jobs – not homeless men) peeing in public parks. Add that to the cows peeing in the street, the rancid garbage piled up as it if were little hay bails, and the black exhaust from the cars. You try to tell yourself to simply breathe through your mouth – and then you won’t actually smell the awfulness, but eventually – you suck it through the nose and it makes you weak in the knees.

Men vs Women
I’m well aware that there is a global contrast between men and women – women still make less, and have less opportunity – even in the western world. However, India angered me in whole new ways when it came to men vs. women. One night my roommates and I watched an old movie, Pretty Woman on DVD. We quickly learned that the Indian government edits the movies before they can be sold to the public – sex scenes are taken out, and nudity is taken out. I could deal with that considering it’s a rather religious country – it saves the need to ‘rate’ movies as they just take anything remotely offensive out. However- as we were watching Pretty Woman, we realized that a whole scene was cut out – the one where Julia Roberts unzips her long, black boot and pulls out a variety of condoms – different flavors and colors – you remember the line “I’m a safety girl!” – the whole scene was deleted once she went to unzip her boot. A little while later, there was a scene where Richard Gere lifts Julie Roberts up on the piano and proceeds to take off her robe. She is wearing only lacey panties and a bra and they are clearly going to have sex on the piano. To our surprise, this whole scene was left in tact. We stopped the movie and all got into a big discussion of horror at how they could remove the scenes about safe sex, and leave the scenes that had sex in them and scantily clad women. Our depressing conclusion – in India (and many parts of the world) women are just seen as sex objects…men learn to have sex with no consequences…no protection…the whole thing was absurd. No wonder why there are 1.2 billion people in India!

The men vs. women things doesn’t end with simple government film censoring. It’s everywhere. While we were there a woman was accused of killing her 1 day old baby girl because she didn’t want another girl. If you are only living on $2 a day…you don’t want a girl…not in India. You have to marry them off, you generally need a dowry, and they are not a good source of income to the family. In most parts of the world there are more women than men – but not in India – for every 1000 boys there are 793 girls. It is illegal to find out the sex of a baby during pregnancy…mainly because when people find out it’s a girl – there’s a higher likelihood that they will abort it.

One of the local English papers had a column where people could ask questions about sex. 95% of the questions were from men. My roommates and I would read it every day in disbelief. However one day we were all furious – someone wrote in a question that was concerned about his wife’s lack of ability to get ‘wet’ – and because of that – he said that he wife complains that it is very painful when he forces her to have sex. The Sex Dr. told him to go buy lubricant. That was it…lubricant. No mention of the fact that the man is forcing his wife to have sex. We were all going to write into the Sex Dr. ourselves and to let him know what a pig and idiot he was.

Lest you think that this is a land of male chauvinists, and sexually irresponsible men – that’s not necessarily the case…in contrast – the women who are successful here are very successful. The current President of India is a female. They have had female Prime Ministers in the past. There are many women that work and that run corporations here. Many women go to university. Even at our volunteer organization, Cross Cultural Solutions, a female ran the whole office, a staff of men. She started the company years ago and was clearly the woman in charge. The whole thing was confusing to me – should I be upset about how women were treated, or should I be happy that women were so successful?

Arranged Marriages vs. Love Marriages
This topic has always fascinated me. In India a large percentage of the population have arranged marriages. For a westerner like myself – I have a hard time understanding and accepting the fact that one’s parents can pick their life partners. In fact, it’s a little terrifying to me. However, if you look at the divorce rates – they are extremely low…it certainly make you wonder.

Since I’ve been in India, I learned a little bit about arranged marriages – such as the fact that your parents/family choose your mate. When a man is in his mid 20’s and a woman in her young 20’s the parents start on a quest to find a good match. This entails talking to various families, friends, and astrologers. The couple meets once or twice to make sure they know each other (even if it is just for a few hours) – then the family starts planning the lavish, ritualistic wedding.

However – if you refuse to have your family arrange a marriage for you, well then – you are marrying for love. This is becoming more popular in India – but it’s not necessarily the ‘better’ way. The arranged marriages seem to work within their culture. Granted there is a part of me that wonders how much simpler life would be if I didn’t really have to worry about dating – and just could have fun until my parents told me to settle down and get married. They would pick out my partner and I would simply do what they said. Right after the cow jumped over the moon.

I look at them vs. them looking at me
People just stare….not trying to be indiscrete at it one bit. In fact – as I type this right now, I have about 5 young Indian men surrounding me in the airport just watching me from the surrounding seats. They are behind me, on the side of me, just staring. I am completely used to this now In fact, if I don’t get the attention – I feel like something must be wrong! In Delhi Indians are used to seeing tourists, (white people) – however if you move out of Delhi and around the countryside – then you turn into a complete oddity. There is no social barrier space, they will come up and touch you, stare at you inches away and generally follow you around just to hear you talk, watch you facial expressions, see your body language. Many times I even caught my students doing this, they would repeat exactly what I would say under their breath not to be heard, but to just mimic. In contrast I could watch the locals all day too with the same utter disbelief that they watched me with. I watched their crazy driving, watched their patience, watched their amazing flexibility when it came to squatting, watched their head bobble and tried to decipher what it meant – yes, no, maybe? I watched them pull of wearing sequins like no other culture can. I watched them dance – always dancing any moment they could with big gestures, the use of the whole body, and an endless energy. Sure, I had seen people from India before, I worked with many. However, when you go into their culture – you see them in a different light – and that’s why I was so fascinated with looking at them.

World IT Leader vs. Dial up connections
It is a fact that India is now the call center of the world. They have partnerships with many large US company to outsource IT departments, help desk, and new development. In my past career I have worked with many of them. So here I am living in the world of IT, yet I can’t seem to get a good internet connection anywhere – let alone a wireless signal. Somewhere in India, there are big building with thousands of programmers working away diligently with good connectivity, and cutting edge computers, yet I never saw them. In contrast, when I go into a local internet cafes – I am jolted back to 1990 – when Internet connections were dial-up, monitors were small, and the computers were painfully slow. If you ever wondered where all of the old computers went that were used in corporations and schools…my answer is…they were shipped to India.

All of these things are the contrasts that you hear about and see quite often. After the first few weeks in India, nothing really surprises you any longer. An elephant in the street – no problem. The power outage 3 times a day – I don’t even flinch. The water shortage – no big deal – you can simply take a bath in a bucket.

It’s the people that really reach inside you to touch your heart. I will remember their hospitality, their smiles, their cries, and their eyes boring a hole inside of me. I will be back to India one day – maybe to teach, maybe to write, maybe to travel…who knows – but regardless of why I’m back – I will embrace it – the good and the bad. There are many things that I learned in India and some things that I ‘un-learned’. But mostly, I learned that I love the countries that intimidate me most.

In India…
I lost weight, I lost hair, I lost some decibels of hearing, I lost my fitness, I lost my ability to be on time, I lost any memory of what it’s like to flush toilet paper down the toilet.
In India…
I gained friends, I gained a head bobble, I gained an understanding of the grammatical use of articles, I gained 15 young adults in my life and my heart, I gained a ring in my nose, I gained an appreciation for being called ‘Mam’, I gained patience.

Me and my class

Tears fell like a monsoon rain…

View Photos of my class and the party

I have cried many tears throughout this year of travel, however they have mainly been tears for me. These tears tend to fall into two categories; tears for my unanswered questions about my future, and tears for joy. However yesterday I shed many, many tears and they weren’t for me at all.

I thought that my last day at my teaching placement at Habitat Learning Center would be difficult for me, but I really didn’t expect it to be emotional. I had run around our local market all morning looking for gifts and treats for the students as today was not going to be about teaching – it was going to be fun. I had planned for us to watch an English movie, Disney’s High School Musical. Even though my students are on average 18 to 20 years old, I felt like this Disney movie would be appropriate – for their culture, their English understanding, and mainly there would be no sex scenes or cursing…you can’t go wrong with Disney in that department! Plus – in my opinion it is similar to a Bollywood movie with an American twist – lots of singing and dancing for no apparent reason. I had purchased the movie along with a large bag of American type movie snacks – Pepsi, Mountain Dew, M&M’s, Snickers, Mars bars, and Twizzlers. In addition to all of the sugar, I also got each of them a notebook to keep their homework and study papers in. Since I’ve been teaching them for the last 4 weeks – I always would hand out many exercises and reading assignments on paper – but they wouldn’t remember to bring them back the next day – or if they did remember, they would be all crumpled up in their bags. I thought this would be a good opportunity to teach them about organization and get them prepared for their next teacher. Inside the folder, I placed my business card with my email address so that they could contact me. Finally, I put all of my extra salwar and kameez outfits into a bag to give to the female students as I would no longer need them. I armed myself with my two cameras, grabbed all of these bags and went to my placement for the last time.

When I arrived there I was surprised to see people there early. In India – there is a term they use called ‘India Time’…which translated means…”Time is irrelevant. I am not tied to any time table, and I will show up generally 15 to 30 minutes late.” I started to get everything set up for the movie and I printed my final report for the NGO. I had spent quite a bit of time on this report writing up my lesson plan I used, what should be studied next with the new teacher, and a paragraph about each student and their knowledge level. I mainly wanted to make sure that the next person to teach, had all the tools possible to make a smooth transition for the kid’s sake.

At ‘intermission’ we had a break and I was going to break out all of the snacks I brought with me, but before I could do that, The NGO coordinator, Nanalie, and one of the teaching assistants, Enoch, came in and presented me with a lovely gift thanking me on behalf of HLC. I had let the kids use my small camera – so they took pictures of us as if they were the paparazzi! However all of a sudden the kids disappeared and I was told to sit down with Nalalie and Enoch. The kids then paraded in cakes, chips, sweets, and a large bouquet of roses. I was stunned and really didn’t know what to do. They had organized this unexpected celebration and I was completely surprised. We had a whole cake cutting ceremony as they explained the various Indian sweets to me. They served Nalalie, Enoch, and myself and continued to shoot a whole bunch of pictures. Me with the cake, me with the roses, me with them…I felt like a star. I was touched by this celebration – but I somehow held it together as I posed for pictures. I knew deep down that I was not going to be able to hold it together very long. I loved these kids – I knew that I had become completely attached to them and I had no idea how I was going to walk out of the office at 5PM.

After the massive amounts of cake and pictures, we got back to the movie and watched the 2nd half of Disney song and dance numbers. After the movie, I knew that I wanted to talk to them all as a group and thank them for their hard work and friendship they had provided me. I wanted them to know how extremely proud I was of each of them, and to motivate them to keep working hard as it would pay off. I had them all stay in the classroom and I began my little speech of thanks and admiration and I peered around the room looking at the faces intently staring at me, the faces that I had come to know so well and I couldn’t even get the words out. I tried to speak, but was overcome with sadness about leaving them. I wanted so much for them – I wanted to make sure that they continue on the road they are going down – as that is the road to a better life for them and their families. I choked the words out and told them to continue to study hard and be nice to the new teacher, and to use the new folders to organize their homework. As I looked up and around the room I had 15 students in tears. I continued to tell them not to be sad and that I would love to come back one day and see how much they have improved. I explained that I expected all of them to continue our relationship via email. I promised to always write them back if they sent me an email.

I handed out the folders one by one and saw each of them crying. It broke my heart to see this. If I could figure out a way to give each of them a better life I would…but they have to figure out how to do that themselves…and I’m positive they are on the road to doing that. I can only hope that I helped them along in their journey. For the first time in 4 weeks, the room was silent. These kids normally crawled in front of each other and practically into your lap to speak – so silence was a new sensation for me. The sadness and crying continued – and it wasn’t just a few tears – there was sobbing. I stood there and thought about the last time that I made a grown man cry.

I first started crying because I had become attached to them and I wasn’t ready to leave there and I knew I would miss them terribly. However, when I saw them crying, I realized that they had become attached to me too. It was a mutual connection. I realized that I had touched their lives in an extraordinary way. It was a true cultural exchange. Earlier in the week Nalalie and Enoch had told me the kids were growing very attached to me and that I had made a strong impact on them, however I sort of dismissed it in my head. Sure, I was sort of aware that I had more and more students attend class every week. I knew that more and more or them were doing their homework. I was aware that during tea break more and more students would come and sit next to me to talk and ask me questions about my life. I was surprised and impressed with the gentlemen who did mock interviews had actually taken what I taught them about business etiquette to heart. Yet, I guess I never really put all of this together and realized that these kids really did enjoy spending time with me and respected me. That may sound stupid – but the whole time I was thinking that I was getting so much from them, yet I didn’t think about what they were getting from me until I looked around the room at their tears and sad faces. All of a sudden my tears were no longer for my sadness, but theirs.

Rohit, who told me the first day of class that he wanted to be a singer (I made him get up that day and sing for me!), got up and sang a song for me on my last day. I actually took video of this moment – to this moment, as I watch it, it puts me in tears. If I can find a way to upload it I will. Next Adidya got up and came to me in the front of the room and bowed/touched my feet. This may sound crazy – but I knew that this was a cultural thing for them – touching someone’s feet is used to show the utmost respect for someone. After he did, each student got up and did the same thing to me. I stood there completely emotional and uncomfortable not knowing what to say – all I could do it thank them.

As we all sat there in a sad silence – I had to finally bring myself to leave the classroom. It was painful for me to pick up my feet and leave the room. I told them one last time to not be sad, but to be happy that we had so much fun and I promised that I would come see them again.

This whole diary entry was about impossible for me to write – as every time I replay the afternoon in my head or through the keyboard – it brings me to tears yet again. I know that this sadness that I feel will diminish, but my memories never will. .

The tears that you shed for others – are the tears which hurt the most.

No more pencils, no more books, no more teacher’s dirty looks…

Over the past year I have had many reasons to smile. Yet today was probably one of the most memorable reasons to smile this entire year of adventure and work free lifestyle. The strangest thing is that this smile spreads across my face uncontrollably and it’s due to the work that I’m doing here. Who knew that work could make me smile?! I only have two days left with my students in Delhi, and I’m trying to savor every moment I can. I honestly don’t want to leave them – but I know that they will be left in good hands as a new volunteer will be placed there. The good news is that he (the new volunteer) is actually a teacher…a real teacher…not an imposter like me! This still doesn’t change the fact that I’d love to take my students home with me and find them jobs…but I don’t think US Customs would allow that. So instead, I have spent my last few evenings putting together a detailed report about the kids, their studies and what to continue with in my absence….I’m basically having trouble letting go – but tomorrow at 5PM – I’m done…I have to cut the cord.

Last week I asked the students what they wanted me to focus on for the last week of class, and the majority wanted to learn more about business interviewing. This was right up my alley…I used to hire and fire people all of the time. Rarely did a week go by that I wasn’t interviewing someone at Coach. This was going to be much easier than trying to teach irregular verbs! However – we still did focus on grammar every day, and we would use the 2nd half of class to talk about how to prepare for, and participate in an interview. As a ‘final’ of sorts, I even organized one of my flatmates, Cate, who used to work in HR to come to my class and conduct ‘mock’ interviews for the students. This would give the students a chance to really practice what they learned on a complete stranger. Over the past 3 weeks they had become pretty comfortable with me, however – speaking to strangers in English…well, that seemed to throw them into a downward spiral of panic! I tried to imagine how I would react if someone had told me that I had to be interviewed in Italian…I too would have had a melt down!

I had 5 of the boys from my class volunteer to participate in an interview with Cate. I provided them a list of 5 possible interview questions and said that Cate would pick 3 of the 5 to ask them. I felt like I needed to give them some guidance else it would be too difficult. I had them practice their answers to these questions by writing essays for me for the last week. This way they had put some forethought into their responses.

I showed up at the Learning Center today and all 5 of them were there early (this never normally happened!), all dressed up in their best clothes, cleaned up, pacing around, practicing their interview answers, and attempting to put on their ties if they happened to have one. The moment I saw this – a huge grin formed across my face. The kind that actually makes your face hurt because you are smiling so hard. I was so proud of these kids, and the fact that they had all actually listened to me made me beam with happiness. I had them draw numbers from a hat to see who would go first – I think I was as nervous as they were for some reason. As they looked at their numbers some were filled with excitement and some were filled with terror. Poor Rohit looked terrified that he was going first!

One of the most touching things to me was when one of them finished their interview, they would come into the room where I was with the rest of the class, they would look relieved that it was over, and then they would trade shoes with the next interviewee as only a few of them had proper ‘business’ shoes as they normally all wear sandals. As I saw them switch shoes and sandals – it made me want to do absolutely anything I could to help them in their lives going forward, I want success for them so badly.

I’m not really sure how I will get through tomorrow without a bunch of tears. This whole experience has been life changing for me – not because I feel like I changed the world – but simply because it has helped me realize how much I enjoy working with young adults and how much I enjoy teaching. Granted – this was a unique experience – one in which all of the students were eager to learn – an experience where a little effort goes a long way in these kids’ lives. However I have to believe that there are opportunities like this all over the world…so who knows what will come of this…time will tell.

To top things off, yesterday was Teacher’s Day here in India. I tried to explain to the kids that I’m not really a teacher, but they either didn’t understand me or pretended not to understand. Some of them came bearing little individual roses…leaving me with a better feeling than any boyfriend has ever left me with! Tomorrow on our last day we are going to simply have fun – listen to music, watch a movie and eat chocolate…everyone knows that the last day of school is always fluff! However this will be the first time I’ve had a last day of school be so sad.

There's a lot of crap in India

Today was yet another holiday in India…the land of constant festivals! Today was Lord Krishna’s birthday – an important God in the Hindu religion. The festival is called Janmashtami – and it basically means that I had the day off of work. It’s strange – I don’t think I’ve ever had a job in my life in which I was upset that I had a day off. However, since my time here teaching the kids is limited – I’d much prefer to be working with them instead of having a free day. Since we all had a free day my roommates and I planned a day out in Delhi. I was very excited about this outing because we were going to go to a museum that I had been anticipating seeing for quite some time now…The International Toilet Museum! I had read about this gem of a site in the Lonely Planet book, and I was hooked…I HAD to see it! Luckily my roommates shared the same sick humor that I did and they were up for the adventure too. In a country in which you spend a great deal of time on the toilet, smelling the toilet, and seeing people ‘use the toilet’ in public – this museum seemed like a perfect fit for India!

The museum was in South Delhi among a poor community. There was a cloud of dust in the air from the dirt road that ran outside the museum grounds. The museum was surrounded by a large white gate and wall, and when we went through the gate, we were welcomed into this pristine oasis of green grass and white buildings. It was as if we had just walked through a portal from dirty, grimy Delhi, to heaven…toilet heaven.

Photo: The Crap Lab
I thought this would just be a funny little museum where I would get to see many toilets – however I was surprised to find out that it was much more than that. Sulabh Toilet Museum was actually a part of the Worldwide Sulabh Sanitation Movement and NGO. It is the 7th largest NGO in the world and we were standing at its world headquarters. They focus on providing sanitation solutions to India, and other countries. Sanitation solutions include environmentally friendly by products such as manure for fertilizer, methane gas, and water to be used for everything except drinking. They also educate the impoverished on sanitation and build public toilets all over Delhi and India. Granted, educating kids in English and computers is important – however educating the public on sanitation is even more important for a country like India – a country with 1.2 billion people, a country where about 75% of those people don’t even have access to a toilet. I was extremely impressed by this organization.

A man came and provided us a personal tour of the museum showing us how over 4,500 years ago they had villages/towns laid out with sanitation in mind. Unfortunately, somewhere along the way of expanding population, India lost this sanitation forethought. We saw toilets through history, royal toilets, temporary toilets, disguised toilets, and portable toilets. We discussed the touchy subjects of squatty potties, using toilet paper or not, budays, compost, golden toilets, why people pee outside, how to make yourself ‘go’, how to not make yourself ‘go’, and the ever important subject of how women can pee standing up. It was a very fun and educational experience!

One of the most important things that Sulabh does is build large public toilets throughout India – one with a sewage treatment on site. The facilities are completely powered and run by the methane gas. The public toilets are built with the poor and homeless in mind. They are used by more than 1000 people per day…which barely scratches the surface in India. After being here for 3 weeks, you grow accustomed to men relieving themselves everywhere and anywhere in public…it’s a strange site and it seems to be accepted here. However, you never really get used to the smell of urine – so strong in some areas that you feel like you are going to pass out. There are public toilets in Delhi –however they are few and far between and they are not cleaned often enough – so that basically leaves people to fend for themselves. Therefore, I’m definitely in favor of any organization that is trying to educate people and improve the situation here!

All in all, it was a fun day off – even though is was full of a lot of crap!
Photo: Me enjoying the Toilet Museum!

So you want to be a super model…

The days are going very fast. Too fast. This is my 3rd week here already and I have no idea where the time went. I only have a week left of teaching and I’m already sad about the thought of leaving.

This month has been full of realizations for me – realizing just how much I have changed in this last year. I think I will look back on this year of travel and say…”August…that was the month that it all came together for me.” However – don’t let that last statement lead you to believe that I have answers on what I will do when I get home…that still is a mystery. I’m talking more about hitting my stride, feeling completely comfortable with my surroundings and life, nirvana in a way. Don’t worry though, I will leave that analysis for another post when I have more time than a simple Spice Diary entry.

This week I have been busy with teaching as usual – and I have continued to love every minute of it. I’ve spent late nights trying to understand grammar rules so that I could teach it correctly – only to figure out that I needn’t try to be that much of a perfectionist. Old habits die hard. I told the kids this week that Sep. 7th was my last day – and they seemed surprised and disappointed – which made my heart drop like a brick.

This Tuesday was a national festival in India called Rakhi Bandhan. This is a celebration for siblings – specifically a festival in which sisters tie a thread around her brother’s wrist as a symbol of protection, loyalty, and affection. Brothers give money or other gifts such as jewelry, shoes, or clothes to their sisters in return. I’m wondering when Halmark will be making this into a holiday worldwide. I’m sure it would sell plenty of cards! This tradition is also carried out between friends representing brotherly and sisterly affection. I now have a number of little red string bracelets from my students – I think my gift to them is teaching them grammar!
A little note for Troy, my brother, I have a lovely piece of red string for you and I will be patiently waiting for my gift! My shoe size is 8 ½…

Photo: Little boy trying to race to get into my shot! They love the camera!
Besides the bracelets – the other perk about this holiday is that you get the day off. India is a land of socializing and festivals – so it seems like one rarely has to work a full work week! I spent my day off getting up at the crack of dawn to work on some photography around Delhi. I went to some of the normal tourist and religious sites and then went to the flower market. There are many things I enjoy about India, but one of the best things is that the people here absolutely LOVE to have their picture taken. I’m really overwhelmed by the number of requests that I receive to take people’s pictures here. This is rather unique as in many countries the people are not too excited about being photographed. In some countries, people even think that it removes the person’s soul when you take a picture. Needless to say – I don’t want to be responsible for a lost soul, so you have to be careful! In other countries you encounter the people that request money for taking their picture as if they were Kate Moss. Trust me – they aren’t even close to Kate Moss, but you still have to have some small change around just in case they think they are a super model. This is all fine until they tell you that it’s not enough money. At that point I tell them to get an agent and come complain to me later. Therefore, when you are in India, take our your camera, and people come running from far and near saying ”Mam, take picture?” It’s a little stunning. The even stranger thing about it is that when you take their picture – they just walk away – they don’t even want to see it – or quite possibly they don’t know that you can see it from a digital point of view. It leaves me a bit bewildered!

On Wednesday of this week, I decided that I needed to see how the other half lived. I am in a posh volunteer assignment – AC, computers, western toilets, a classroom, beautiful facilities, clean kids, and gardens. However, my fellow volunteers work in a very different environment. I decided to accompany Kate to her assignment to see what her surroundings are like. Kate designs, makes, and sells jewelry in the Boston area. Her volunteer placement is to teach poor, local women here how to make jewelry in the hopes that they can utilize this skill to make some money on their own. Her surroundings are certainly different than my placement. She works in one of the many poor communities ( a.k.a. slum). She works in this little school room on the floor with no AC and surrounded by the local women plus their kids and the random stray dog laying around. I was excited to go with her as it was a wonderful chance for me to not only sweat my ass off, but also get take some colorful pictures of the women and their kids. I even took a little walk around the community to see more locals – but I wasn’t expecting the reception I received. Since I had my camera in hand, I was mobbed! Everyone came from near and far to get their picture taken…never really looking at it, just jumping in front of the lens to be in the picture. In fact, it was near impossible to get shot with just one of two people in it as everyone pushed in front of them until they were about 2 inches from my lens. I needed someone walking around me for crowd control! However – in a situation like that, it’s really hard not to take a wonderful picture. The kids were adorable; they were all so happy and full of energy.

The rest of the week so far has been about lesson plans, and fall travel plans. I can hardly believe that I only have one week left of volunteer work. Of course – when I have finally remembered all of my student’s names correctly – then I will be leaving! Ah – but I will always have the photos…

Swept off My feet

To see all of the photos from my young ESL class – click here!

Another week has passed. Something has happened that I really wasn’t expecting – it has taken me by surprise. All my thoughts are consumed by it…I am giddy…I walk around with a big smile on my face when I talk about it…I am elated. I have been swept off my feet! No, not by some wonderful, sexy man; but by my students at my volunteer placement.

Photo: My class of young kids on their last day!
This week I have become attached to my students. I enjoy teaching these kids more than I ever thought I would. I have the desire to work my ass off for them. My attachment to the older kids grows every night as I’m up until 1AM correctling papers and reviewing their homework and trying to come up with new exercises and topics to really challenge and excite them. Here’s the real surprise – I feel like I’m making a difference every day I work with these kids. Before I came to India, I talked to many volunteer ‘alumni’ about their experience here and if they felt like they made a difference. The overwhelming answer to that question was always met with hesitation – normally following by a “Yes, but…it’s a difference in a very small way. You may not feel like you’ve really had an impact – but you just have to know and believe that just be being there you have made an impact.” Based on this consistent feedback which I heard from everyone, I came here trying to set my expectations appropriately and told myself that I wouldn’t expect to change the world or be able to make a big impact, I would simply do my work, and know that being here was better than not being here.

Photo: Preeti, holding up her final assignment!
Yet only 2 weeks into my 4 week placement, I already feel like I’ve had an impact. With my younger group of beginning students – they can use a mouse, type in MS Word, tell me their name, age, and how they are doing – all in English – with various degrees of prompting. Sure – there is a cynical part of me that is a bit concerned that I’ve just armed these kids to go out and be more effective beggars with some English skills. Will they now go to cars and bang on the window speaking to the passengers in clever English asking for money? I try not to think about that. The young kids had their last day today and we spent the time working on a final computer project, making bracelets, eating candy bars, playing vocabulary games, and taking photos. I was sad to see them go – yet I had only been with them for a little over a week. I wonder what their lives will hold.

Then there’s my older kids that I teach in the afternoon. I’ve become fully engrossed in teaching the older kids. The reason why is simple – they really, really want to learn. They know that their time they spend at the Habitat Learning Center is their shot….it may be their only shot. In India, education is king. It can be the difference between barely living on 2 meals a day and be able to support your family and provide a home. As I work with these kids I have learned more and more about them. They come from poor backgrounds and for some reason or another, they started in school, but had to drop out due to family reasons and/or money. However, they were chosen, plucked from their spiraling situations and given a second chance. They had to prove themselves first within their local community NGO – but they eventually were asked to come study at Habitat Learning Center where they could learn computer skills, English, and be tutored in science and math. Therefore, as I stand before them trying my best to explain when to use the article ‘a’ and when to use the article ‘the’, their attention is focused on my every word. I give them homework, and lots of it – but they actually do it. Everyday I have a few more kids show up in class, which is a great feeling.

Photo: Final day of class!
Besides the Grammar and reading comprehension – I’m making them practice their speaking…which they hate me for. I make them get up and read in front of the class in English. I give them newspaper clippings in English to read and then present. As for the computers – I have taught them how to evaluate a website and it’s usability. Prior to me arriving they all learned a little HTML through Dreamweaver – so I thought the next logical step was to teach them design…plus – I don’t know HTML…so I really couldn’t help in that department! This week we also went over how to do effective searching on the internet and explained what a search engine was. It was a great way to introduce some new grammar too…such as the verb ‘google’ and the concept of AND, OR, AND NOT statements…who knew that Google could be so educational!

I am busy working on more topics and grammar studies – and I’m excited to spend the remaining two weeks with them. Just seeing them every day makes me happy!

As for the rest of my life in India…well, there hasn’t been much time for anything else this week except preparing for teaching and teaching. I am going to Agra this weekend to see the Taj Mahal – that should be a photographic adventure!

One last thing to share – I had a dream last night that I arrived back at home. The dream was pretty fuzzy, as dreams go. I was back at my apartment looking around at all of my stuff, and I was also back in a work setting looking around at my surroundings. I had an overwhelming feeling of disinterest in everything. One of my friends came to visit me in my apartment and welcome me back and I said, that I was only going to stay for a month of so and then leave again as there was nothing here for me any longer. The dream was certainly unsettling as I woke up and thought about it for quite some time. The people I have met during my travels often ask me if anything ever scares me while I’m traveling…my reply is normally – “no, nothing much.” Yet apparently my sleeping psyche knows exactly what scares me most.

Photo: The complete class of the young kids and me on their final day!

Indian Wedding prep

Mam, there are 20 different ways to tie a sari.

For photos of Ladie’s Night – click here!

Every day is full of lessons. Today was a varied as normal. I’m starting to get a feel for the teaching. A part of me even thinks that I’m good at it…and then I realize the difference between ‘that’ and ‘this’…and I’m jolted back to reality. Regardless of how effective I am, I thoroughly enjoy working with the kids. Today we taught emotions such as happy, sad, grumpy, cold, hot, tired, and fine. I released my inner actress and had a blast acting out these emotions with the kids…laughing with them as they were laughing at me. The one thing that will stick in my brain for the rest of my life is the word ‘mam’. In the US we call our teachers Mrs. Farris, or Ms. Robinson – here – I am not Ms. Ott – or even Ms. Sherry…I am ‘mam’. I believe that I get called mam no less than 200 times a day. “Mam, may I come in” , “Mam, may I leave the room” , “Yes Mam”, “Mam…(proceeded by a paper being shoved in my face so that I will look at it.)”, or my favorite – “Mam…(followed by a long sentence in Hindi that I don’t understand)”

I am starting to feel very comfortable with the older class – they are good kids – and each of them are terrified to stand up in front of the class and speak English aloud. Considering I make them do this all of the time- I think they secretly hate me…but I just keep telling them that they have to practice. I’m sure that they sit around during their tea break and say “Mam is very, very mean”.

The kids have also decided that it’s their responsibity to make sure that my food and drink are taken care of. At every break, they ask if they can bring me coffee or tea. Then they proceed to make fun of me because it takes me so long to drink my coffee. “Mam, you have coffee for 10 minutes and you still not finished.” My answer – Americans multi-task. We never do just one thing like drink our coffee. Instead – we drink our coffee while checking papers, or we eat our lunch at the computer while we are working on a lesson plan. They think this multi-tasking is funny and they proceed to laugh at me. Today as I was leaving one of them stopped me…”Mam, wait.” Proceeded by taking me by the arm and into a lounge room where a young boy was making a individual little plates of treats – somosas and little honey balls with a small cup of Pepsi. They gave me a plate with a piping hot somosa. I asked them what the occasion was – and found out that the young boy who was dishes out the tasty food had just purchased a bike and he brought in food to celebrate this momentous occasion. Wow….that was my only reaction. You have to love a culture that celebrates every occasion with food.

This afternoon our volunteer organization, CCS, held a ‘ladies night’. Of course I was secretly hoping that this meant free flowing vodka and scantily clad men – but no such luck. CCS had brought in some lovely women to talk to us about the marriage rituals in India. Basically – they showed us what it was like to be an Indian Bride. One of my fellow volunteers, JoAnna, was our ‘Indian’ bride and she was put through al of the ritualistic preparations that any Indian girl would have done on her wedding day. Makeup, hair, jewels, bindis, sari, more jewels, and henna. We learned that there are actually 20 different ways to tie a sari. I would need a personal assistant to dress me every day if I wore a sari – a sar is made up of 6 yards of fabric…that’s equates to a lot of wrapping!

Finally – a few of us went to a local family’s house for dinner. Lalit – the neighborhood tailor – graciously invited all of us over to his house to meet his family and have dinner. We have been going to his shop to get some of our work clothes tailored and we struck up a friendship through his good English skills. He lives in Old Delhi, so he even had a driver come pick us up and bring us back. Once again – I was absolutely blown away by the Indian hospitality. This was a very different experience from the night before – but the experience tonight was probably more typical of Indian family life. Lalit did not have any ‘servants’ that he employed in his home, and he lived with his whole extended family including his 80 year old mother. The whole family waited on us the throughout the evening and provided us an amazing meal. Lalit sat at the table with us and ate dinner with us – the rest of the family watched and served us. He said that they would eat afterward. I’m not sure if this was custom when they have guests, or if it was because they had no more chairs. The whole experience was rather surreal – and so very culturally different than America. I don’t feel comfortable having people wait on me – but yet I know that this is their culture and it’s best to not fight it, but try your hardest to simply accept it and fit into it the best you can. What may be considered uncomfortable for one person is acceptable to another.

Another day, another day of varied experiences….

Typical street traffic in Old Delhi

I learned today that there is a man that works in our colony (neighborhood) that simply is the ‘ironing man’. No – I’m not talking about a James Taylor song. He irons clothes all day for 1 rupee per piece – that equates to about 2 cents a garment. He works between my flat and my neighbors flat, collecting the washed and dried clothes from the various housekeepers and ironing them all day out in the alleyway. That’s India.

I also learned that even though I speak English fluently – I have no clue about English grammar. Seriously, without looking it up – how many people out there know what first person singular is, or what a silent voice sound is, or what a modal auxiliary is? Now, take it one step further – can you explain it to a bunch of people that don’t speak English? By the end of my 4 week placement – I will have re-learned my 5th grade education. I’m sure that all of the people that read my blog are looking forward to my new and improved grammar…lord knows that my writing can use some grammatical help!

We made some much needed changes to my schedule today. Me and my volunteer partner, Thea, have split up the two classes we are teaching so that we are both teaching one class each day instead trying to teach and prepare for both classes. Thea has agreed to work with the younger kids, and I have taken on the older kids – ages 16 – 24. They have varying degrees of English skills and they all seem to want to be software engineers or fashion designers. There are advantages and disadvantages to teaching the older kids. It’s great that they understand me better and I don’t struggle as much with the language barrier; however, since they are more advanced- this means that I am panicked because I don’t know what a modal auxiliary is! Today we worked on contractions and reading comprehension. I certainly faltered at trying to explain why ‘they’re’ wasn’t spelled ‘there’…but they sound the same. At least I know that I am still pretty good at thinking on my feet.

My class told me today that teachers are held in very high esteem in India…even more so than parents. Before I knew it they were taking pictures of me up at the white board in my salwar, kameez, and duppatta (tunic, baggy pants, and scarf) to show their parents. Don’t worry – soon enough I will show you all the picture of my in my classic Indian wear – I know you are all dieing to see it.

We had a lecture today from a Economics professor about the economic state of India. The one statistic that stuck with me was that 75% of the 1.2 billion population make less than $2 a day. I believe the ironing man is one of the 75%.

I finished my day with attending a lovely dinner at my neighbor’s flat. The couple (a retired police officer/laywer, and his wife, a professor) invited me and my flatmates over for dinner. This had to be one of my highlights of my stay so far. I love interacting with locals, seeing lifestyles, and connecting with people. As we sat and had dinner and lively conversation about India and the US, I was overwhelmed with a thought. I don’t want this travel lifestyle to end. I am so happy doing what I’m doing – I just don’t want it to end. My neighbors have two daughters in NYC which I look forward to meeting one day and hopefully returning the lovely hospitality that their parents provided. I am absolutely overwhelmed by the hospitality here – I’ve never quite experienced a culture like this – so warm and friendly. People are genuinely interested in learning about you and vice versa. They love their tourists here – and they treat them with the utmost respect. It makes me re-think all of those times riding the subway in NY where I see foreigners that look lost and I do nothing…just keep walking. That’s not the case in India…it’s the anti-New York. Indians don’t go by the rule of ‘don’t talk to strangers’…as they think that the strangers are the most interesting people they meet – and you never know where you may end up! To top it off – everyone loves to have their picture taken here! What a photographer’s paradise!

I really love it here…it’s loud, crowded, dirty, and colorful…I walk around with a big grin on my face…it’s beautiful. Honestly – I can’t imagine anything surprising me anymore. I find it kind of fun though to watch my fellow volunteers who I’m living and working with deal with their entry into India. They are shocked, and exhausted from it all. It makes me feel good in a strange way – it makes me realize how much I’ve grown used to traveling, to constant change, to patience – and I’m very proud of that. This is really the first time that I think I’ve realized just how much I have changed this last year from my travels. I feel like I can honestly handle anything now…that I will roll with whatever comes my way – not get too wound up about anything. I wonder if anyone will notice a difference in me when I come back…I wonder how I will ever come back!

Chandni Chowk Market Old Delhi

Finished week 1 – Intermittent Power and Water – But Plenty of Hospitality!

Whoohooo…..it’s the weekend! I’ve worked my butt off this week – mainly stressing out about teaching and banging my head against a wall when it comes to internet usage around here..which I can’t seem to find anywhere with any reliability.

Despite being in a nice air conditioned building with ample facilities to teach – I am having a very hard time teaching. This is mainly due to the amount of work that I have to do to prepare for teaching 2 different classes every day in English and Computers. The bad news is that I can’t even re-use what I’ve done for one class because one class is a beginning class barely learning their A,B,C’s and the other class wants me to teach them advanced grammar and HTML…it’s like teaching kindergarten and high school in the same day..and I’m not a teacher…nor do I know HTML. So – I try to spend my nights searching the internet for lesson plan ideas and tutorials on various topics ranging from coloring the rainbow to good website design. And then the power goes out for a few hours…oh – the unpredictability of India. Yesterday we also ran out of water…we now fill up buckets as a backup just in case we run out again.

My placement has it’s challenges – however – I just keep reminding myself to be thankful that I’m not assigned to Catherine’s position – working with a group of mentally ill patients in the slums. Monday her task is to cut the mental patients’ hair….the direction she was given was that it couldn’t look any worse than it does. All of a sudden my lesson planning looks pretty posh. At least I’m not cutting the lice ridden hair for the mentally ill in the slums of India – that’s pretty much hell.

This weekend I stayed in Delhi to see some of the sites around here as I haven’t had time during the week. This also meant that we could finally venture out and find an establishment that served alcohol. My favorite thing to do here in Delhi is simply ride in a car. I am enthralled by watching the world outside…the crazy world of bikes, people, cars, horns, cows, dogs, poverty, and buses packed 3 times as full as the C train at rush hour in NYC.

The first thing that I have learned is that the people here are extremely friendly. We have been invited to dinner or drinks by various neighbors, and shop keepers. Sure – some might be offered more as a cordial thing to say – but some of the offers are followed up on. One of the other volunteers the other day said – “When we see a foreigner in a grocery store we ignore them. Yet in India, when they see a foreigner in a market, they go straight up to the visitor and start talking to them, helping them, befriending them.” It’s absolutely true. I’ve never been showered with such hospitality before – it’s overwhelming. Plus, it’s so opposite from my experience in Egypt and Morocco – where you were stared at and hassled to no end. Sure – you still have to really have your guard up here in India – as there are many tourists scams to be wary of – but you use your best judgement and we always tell our CCS staff about the various invitations and interactions and they can direct us on who’s being genuine and who isn’t.

So – this weekend has been a good break – but now I’m back to lesson planning and hunting for internet connectivity – trying to get ready for my week ahead!

Independence Day!

I’m surprised…very surprised by India. I’m surprised that I have adjusted so easily…dare I say it – but India was actually a very easy transition for me. Sure – as we drove from the airport to the flat on Saturday morning we dodged the cows in the road, I saw people sleeping out on the streets…we drove down the wrong side of the road most of the time, and ignored stop lights…but in my world these days…that’s all normal. I think I can finally call myself a seasoned traveler. However, what hasn’t been easy is the transition from vagabond to responsible worker. Simply typing the word responsible worker makes me cringe.

It’s Independence day here in India…the 60th Anniversary of their freedom from the British. It’s a national holiday – yet we’ve been instructed to stay close to our flat as the possibility of violence is heightened during this joyous time…which is par for the course in the ‘country of contrasts’ – India. So I sit here – filling my time with eating, reading magazines, writing, preparing lesson plans, and getting to know my new flatmates. There are 5 of us living in our flat – all Americans, all women, all over 30. Maybe volunteer vacations are the new mid-life crisis for women. Men buy a porcshe and have an affair, women go to third world countries and volunteer…go figure. We never seem to be on the same planet do we?

The most stunning thing I have learned so far is not that the cows roam freely everywhere …and I mean everywhere – but instead – I was stunned to find out the Code of Conduct for Cross Cultural Solutions does not allow any alcohol to be consumed during the weekday or in the flats. Somehow they left this out of the brochure. I know that I wouldn’t have missed a statement like that….no alcohol…the red warning light would have went off in my head for sure.

Since I have arrived, we have completed our orientation for our volunteer activities and have been set loose at our NGO’s. I have been assigned to the Habitat Learning Center – an oasis in the world of NGO’s. It’s an oasis because it’s a posh campus-like setting – with modern buildings, air conditioning, cafeteria, and computers. While my fellow flatmates are in mental institutions in the middle of slums, or teaching how to make jewelry in a hut in the slums – I’ve got it pretty good. My first surprise came when I found out that myself and another volunteer are to teach not one, but two separate classes of students – English and computers. Yesterday we went to meet our volunteer coordinator at our site, and my worst fear came true…she wasn’t there…but the kids were. Originally – we weren’t supposed to be teaching that day – simply meeting with the coordinator. However – before I knew it I was standing in front of 15 kids, and 2 mothers…all eyes on me – waiting to drip on my every English word…and I had no idea what to say. I hadn’t prepared anything to teach that day….but there they were – expecting us to teach. So – I did what I do best – think on my feet…starting with teaching the phrase “My name is ….” I hate being unprepared. Even with thousands of miles logged in my life this year – I am still a perfectionist…I can’t seem to shed it – no matter how hard I try.

So – I spend my day off trying to prepare without the internet at my disposal…which really makes me feel lost. I have spent the last hour pulling photos of Lions, Elephants, and oranges from my travel photography to help teach the English alphabet…reminding myself that it didn’t have to be perfect. I lay awake at night trying to sleep – but consumed with thoughts about how and what I will teach for 3 weeks with no real direction, no good grasp on teaching grammar, and no understanding of Hindi…I wanted a challenge – and I found it.

Now – if I could only find a beer…that would most certainly help me sleep at night!

Photo: Market in Old Delhi preparing temple flowers

I have arrived in India…everyone said that it would be an assault to your senses, that it would be overwhelming, that it would be hard – after all, India is the big leagues for vagabonds like myself. Yet, I arrived here 5 days ago – and I’ve felt none of this. It’s been a simple transition so far – yet I proceed cautiously. My only explanation for this is that my past travel experiences have seasoned me – and for that, I’m immensely proud. I wear a big grin on my face and think to myself…India…try to shock me!

Granted – my ease with India also has to do with the fact that I’m not doing the normal travel thing through this country. Instead, I have decided to slow down a bit and give back. Traveling around the world for 15 months is a privilege and I am thankful for my opportunities every day – yet at some point, being thankful isn’t enough. When you become a global citizen, you want to give back. So that’s why I’m here…I want to do something for this world…and I chose India. I am ‘employed’ by a US based volunteer organization named Cross Cultural Solutions. I use the word employed loosely as I actually paid them to be here . That was my first myth of volunteering that I learned about…volunteering isn’t free. Cross Cultural Solutions (CCS) has a Delhi office and an efficient organized operation in India. They partner with the local Non Government Organizations (NGO’s) and assign the volunteers to work for these various local agencies. It’s the responsibility of CCS to take care of our daily needs though. They put the volunteers up in a middle income neighborhood flat, and they teach us about cultural exchange, Indian history, volunteering, and generally the staff supports us while we are in the country. This is a cultural exchange volunteer program – we provide our services and in exchange – we learn about the culture here and really try to integrate into it.

As I arrived in Delhi, a member of the CCS staff picked me up, gave me a welcome packet, dodged the cows in the middle of the road (no, I’m not joking) dropped me at my new apartment which I share with 5 other volunteers, and started orienting me to the local area and my upcoming work. This isn’t my usual off the plane experience (except for the cow) – so maybe that’s why it is going to smoothly so far. Oh yeah….CCS also employs full time cooks that provide us all of our meals….Indian meals…yum!

Photo: Humayun’s Tomb in Delhi

Lest you think this is about pampering…it isn’t. This is work. I will be teaching teenage kids who are impoverished and cannot attend regular school. I will be teaching them conversational English and general computer skills so that they can have a better chance to get a job without any formal schooling. One other thing…I don’t speak Hindi…so this is not going to be a walk in the park!

The weekends are our freetime to do whatever we want. I hope to have time to explore India from more of a traveling perspective – In addition to Delhi in depth, I hope to spend time in Jaipur, Agra, and Udaipur.

Since my time here in India is a little different from my previous travel experiences ( I actually have to set an alarm and get up and go to work…god forbid), I’m not real sure how well I will keep the website up to date. In addition there are daily power outages and a lack of good internet cafes in my new neighborhood. I actually have to take my free time to prepare lesson plans. Therefore, I think that I will be able to do short little posts – to let you know how things are going. I will call them Spice Diaries. Short little diary entries on my experience as a volunteer – good and bad – and not really edited – I will just keep it as more of a true diary. Once I finish my assignment I will focus on doing some more in depth travel writing again. This may come as a relief to some of you who complain to me that you are unable to keep up with my website!

So – use this time wisely – catch up on the site and the photos. Check into the site every now and then and read the Spice Diaries…and see what happens when an 11 month unemployed vagabonder has to go back to work for 4 weeks in a Third World country. Namaste!